Tears

You could always opt for a planned c section? That’s what I’m doing second time around.

@Sophia my midwife and consultant both have said they don’t usually offer c sections just because of tears. Maybe I should bring it up to see if it is an option, tbh the thought of a c section scares me aswell I don’t like the sounds of how long recovery can take especially while having a 2 year old!

This might sound daft but would an episiotomy be better than risking it tear?

@Emily you are within your right to request a c section, they can’t deny the option to any one. Totally fair re not liking the thought of a c section! There’s no ‘easier’ way is there 😢 what I would say though, is that a planned c section will all be done in an hour in a ca environment and many folk find the recovery a lot quicker than anticipated!

*calm environment

I had episiotomy with my first and had second 18 months later and tore 3rd degree but in a different place. When I got my checkup she told me it was only a 2/3% I should have torn this time so I was super unlucky but baby girls labour was super fast and she wasn’t waiting around so that didn’t help me! Xx

I had a 3rd degree tear with my first. The second they did an episiotomy but I didn’t actually need it in the end. Babies 3 and 4 flew out baby 3 was a scratch. Baby 4 (12 years later) was no injury at all. Once you’ve stretched the first time your body is fine after that. I only tore cause the midwife decided to try and soften the area woth warm water instead of giving an episiotomy when they thought she’d be over 10lb 🙄

@Sophia Thankyou! There definitely isn’t an easier way unfortunately 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 I’m definitely going to get in touch with my midwife just to go over the possibility of a c section though so frustrating they’ve made it sound like I couldn’t have one!

@Kate it actually sounds really smart and I’m annoyed I didn’t think of it 😂 I’ll definitely be asking my midwife if it’s something they’d think about, Thankyou!

@Kiebha how did you find recovery second time round if you don’t mind me asking!? My first flew out of me which is why I tore and I’ve obviously heard 2nd labours tend to be quicker so I’m conscious of that!! X

@Emily I’m a worrier so was constantly checking and asking. Everything healed fine though, it was a little harder because I had my first to still tend to and look after so I couldn’t just rest. I’m sure you will be absolutely fine 🫶🏼 x

@Abs it’s good to know they can fly out of you and not cause damage! 😂 that’s how I ended up tearing with my 1st! Warm water is crazy id love to know what goes through their head’s sometimes 🤦🏻‍♀️I’ve been told they’ll have 2 midwives either side holding my vag and putting pressure on it when his head is coming out to try and prevent tearing again but I just can’t see how this will do anything!

I have an episiotomy and the recovery was a lot but I had no issues afterwards

If you do go down planned c section route you can 100% ask for one and they have to give it to you. They don’t offer it out because it costs a lot for the NHS x

And they will try to talk you out of it because of this. You can say you are aware of the risks and they outweigh the risks of a vaginal delivery so you would like to opt for one x