I'm sorry that he's making you feel that way. To prevent disappointment, I celebrate my own special days with my son. Get yourself a gift (from your child), book a spa day, do something nice. You deserve it!
Oh and I have naturally and sadly put a bit less effort in to occasions that celebrate him like fathers day and Christmas. It's all very unimportant to him and it doesn't matter if it's important to me. It's my birthday this weekend, I've booked the table, sorted childcare, told him what we are doing he loves the sound of it and we will have a great time but I've sorted myself lol. And he said oh I guess il have to get you a present. I had to go to the car on Christmas day to get a carrier bag with a bottle of rum and a pj hoodie out which he had panic bought the night before. I bought my own presents this year for mother's day and my birthday too.
2 can play that game. Forget his birthday and Father’s Day bet he gon learn then!
Thanks ladies. Think you’re all right. I’m just thinking about which one to do first. Might buy myself a lovely expensive gift and tell him it’s from him. But he might think it’s alright then! Or just not do anything for his birthday or Father’s Day but I just don’t want to come down to his level. The other option is to be nice but they say nice finish last . Be good has always won in my heart but I’m starting to wonder if I should forget that and realise I’ve been cheating myself
The best thing you can do when you have a partner like that is just not have expectations of him on those days. When I was married to my ex for 15 years, I planned out my own celebrations. For my birthday I would decorate the way that made me feel happy, I'd plan the day with the things I wanted to do and would buy myself something I wanted. I eneded up enjoying my day and not caring about what he was going to or not going to do. And maybe in the process he will end up feeling bad for not doing something for you, but don't count on it and don't do it for him. And I wouldn't stoop to his level, I still did things for my ex. It is hard and eventually your heart ends up not being in it as much naturally but still do your best. This is about you and who you are as a person.
Yeah exactly do it FOR you don't do it TO him. What Tallya said about expectations is very true and it helps me be happy
I tell my husband I want to go out to dinner. We split the bill with our card but at least I don’t have to think about what to cook or eat take out. I feel so bad for women like us. We do so much but get no appreciation.
I’d be pretty pissed, feel like there’s just no excuse to be lazy and thoughtless, I would tell him and make it very clear how it made you feel and that you know he’s not going to think to even make it up to you but make it clear he needs to start thinking ahead because it’s making you feel crap and not appreciated If he continues then unfortunately you either put up with it or don’t - sometimes this is just who people are and they aren’t going to change, for me it’s unacceptable but I understand when you’ve been in a relationship a long time some things you have to let slide and work out what’s a big deal to you and what you’re going to have to ignore, but you definitely have the right to be annoyed!
This was my third Mother’s Day and last year he went to an away football match in Manchester with his older son (who’s not mine) I was livid. Didn’t speak to him for a week. This year he done the same. Literally left the house at 10 didn’t get home till 4:30. Took his son to his football match. Didn’t even offer to take our son so I could have a relaxing day. I was meant to get breakfast. When I asked he said he didn’t think I’d want any. Didn’t even ask me but managed to make breaks fast for the boys. Didn’t even apologise when he came home. And now he’s mad at me because I’m upset about it
I dont even remember my first Mother’s Day because these two bad ones have ruined my view on it now
It's funny how we all sing a similar tune about our men... Different species! We're so bloody thoughtful lol
So my husband is pretty selfish with those things and I've learnt and accepted that I have to take the lead. I told him he was helping the kids make me breakfast, I was getting a lie in and I was spending the day down the allotment with a bottle of prosecco! There was a little bit of eye rolling the night before but i got my wish! Not saying you don't have a right to feel upset, I been there.