When your spouse asks you why you’re so tired..
Has anyone experienced annoyance when their spouse asks them why they’re so tired?
Backstory: my husband works graveyard so I take care of our 15mo old from 6pm to 6pm with the exception of him changing one diaper and putting her down for a nap when he gets home. Our daughter is a mamas girl and when she doesn’t want to go to him he lets it be and just gets on his phone.
Today he asked me why I’m so tired if I sleep when she sleeps through the night and I honestly feel I’m getting overstimulated with the constant engagement and running after our energetic daughter. I calmly answered his question but found myself upset that he sees it as such an easy task to take care of a little human all day.
I guess I’m just here to vent but has anyone experienced this also and what are your suggestions on letting go of any negative feelings related to this?
Would love to hear from you!
I would like to believe fathers, don’t mean any harm when they ask this question. They don’t see the mental load from just looking at us , mothers. They may be looking at a “calm” baby at the moment and forget how much work it is to care for one. Also, they don’t biologically have the hormones that mothers have that draws us to respond to our baby’s cry ie why we start lactating when they cry which can be emotionally exhausting in itself. The task to keep a baby soothed is for sure a tiresome responsibility for anyone which is why we all need breaks. I think it would be better if fathers rephrased that question like “ what was the most tired-some part of taking care of the baby today? “ it would come off as genuine curiosity