in Mamas with depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders

Am I nuts

Long time ago me and fiance agreed ed to no porn or stimulating images or anything because of how it made me feel and I keep finging more and more where he hasn't gotten rid of it or keeps adding to it on top of that Dr's don't really know what's going on with me but based woth family history or female part cancer I am already having alot of those symptoms they sent a referral to oncology and hematology they started me on provera shots it's painful to have sex I'm in constant chronic pain of the pelvic area and it makes me not want to have sex I've confronted him multiple times made him aware of how it makes me feel and he just keeps going and to me it seems like sex or porn or pornographic images are more important to him than our relationship and just because I can't have sex he just going to get it some where else

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I’m so sorry that you’re going through that❤️ Unfortunately I think wanting sex/sexual stimulation is part of human behaviour, regardless of our personal situations. I agree there’s a lack of respect there but I wouldn’t hold it against him; it’s fruitless and will only add to your stress.

@Emma what you don't get is if I have anything like that he will get mad and accuse me of cheating I just don't think it's right

Porn and sexual images are something I said was a deal breaker in our relationship. To me that is micro cheating (look up what it means before getting offended, y'all). If you put that boundary down even if it's "acceptable" to others or "normal" doesn't mean it is acceptable in your relationship. He's disrespecting you, personally. I think we live in a culture that normalized porn through the images they push in adds and video games and created unrealistic body and sex expectations and caused our men to be weak of will towards that matter. I am sorry you're going through this but you need to come up with consequences if he continues. Breaking up, taking a break, getting blocks on his phone, I'm not sure but I encourage something. No consequences = no change.

Hi! This is off topic to your situation. While I don’t know your family history. I struggled with pelvic pain and pressure etc. I have Interstitial cystitis. It’s very common in women and is triggered by pregnancy and is often overlooked by doctors. Worth bringing up! I wish you the best of luck

Porn is absolutely not a human need and it’s not in human nature to watch it. It’s man made so that doesn’t make sense. Humans have evolved emotionally enough to form relationships that are ethical. He is openly disrespecting a very VERY important boundary you’ve set and disrespecting you heavily.