Something is seriously wrong with me.

I have so much pent up anger and frustration at the world. Everything is going wrong. I feel trapped, lonely, misunderstood, useless, tired and depressed, but also full of energy...if that makes any sense. I'm perimenopausal so my hormones are everywhere. I have had a series of unfortunate events happen to me in the past few months. I feel like these things have given me social anxiety. I don't want to go outside because whenever I do, something bad happens. I'm always in pain. I have had chronic migraines (like 2-3 times a week). I have a fear of being happy. My neurologist recently took me off of of all of my previously prescribed medications for pain and anxiety and put me on Amitriptyline. It seemed ok at first but now, I don't think it is working out too well. I am struggling trying to adjust. I'm screwing up at work. It's a struggle just to make it through the day. I feel broken and insignificant. Like I can't be fixed. I'm tired of playing the medication game. I just want to go to to sleep and never wake up.
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I am so sorry you are struggling. You might try the genesight test. It is a DNA test. When my son was diagnosed with depression, we had the testing already done for ADHD medication. Well the test doesn’t really give you good information for ADHD. We picked one of his Green good to go medication’s for depression and we saw a change in his behavior in three days. I also understand, feeling trapped and feeling like why did I make the decisions I made when I was younger and affect how I am now. I will getting an IUD and hormone replacement therapy has helped a lot. I wish there was something I could say they could really help but know that you’re not alone.

I feel the exact same way you do. My doctors don't listen to me, I feel like I'm completely alone in this.

Jennifer I also struggle with migraine and have been for my entire life. Recently I fell and knocked some vertebrae out of whack. I have a migraine 24/7 and am very depressed. I relocated to another state and tried 3 neurologists with no luck. On my second pain and management doctor and doing tests. I feel like he is listening. Zoom with my original neurologist that I’ve been seeing since 2001. I understand your thoughts to give up but keep trying new doctors and specialists. I pray for you. Also find a good therapist. Try new ones til you find the right person for your needs.

I'm seeing a therapist and have been to a few specialist. I also have herniated disc in my C3 and C4 which contributes to my migraines. I am suppose to get an EMG in a few weeks. I just started seeing this new neurologist/ headache specialist so we'll see. Most of my depression stems from grief too. I had so many plans for my future and it all suddenly changed due to major life events that were not my fault and out of my control. Now I'm just floating in limbo it seems.

I recently listened to both parents to tragic deaths and became estranged from my son all in one year. I just want you to know I feel your pain and you are nir alone in the universe

I’m new here. I’m 47 and my heart breaks for you guys. I’m feeling the hopeless few and never wanting wake up. Life is so freaking hard especially when you’re deal with your health. I’m here if y’all ever want to talk. Please don’t hesitate to reach out. I love this app.

Hi Jennifer..I can completely resonate with u I know we are dealing with situations that can be quite baffling and hopeless at times...our mind and body are completely out of sync ..it's very hard to reflect and reach out to others....feel like we will go bonkers if we stay in the phase of uncertainty and depression...Ia perimenopausal... depression and anxiety have become the new normal...don't know when was the last time I smiled..🥺I pray and wish you should get all the strength to get out of this phase and be in a happy place dear...god bless❤️

Girl you are not alone… I feel so insignificant in life right now. My anxiety is through the roof. I’m sick of trying to make everyone happy. I feel alone. Being a mom to a teenage boy a husband who doesn’t understand it just sucks. Some days I just don’t care if I don’t wake up.

@Deena ...I miss my kids being kids. I'm definitely suffering from empty nest syndrome. My BF of 9 years died in November suddenly and tragically. I feel so alone. I'm proud of my kids that they are strong, good independent adults. But I get lonely sometimes knowing they don't really need me anymore. My children gave me purpose. I have TOO much free time.

I’m so sorry. That is hard. I still have my son around and it’s a hard transition going from kid mom to teen mom & I know the hardest transition is going to empty nest syndrome. No one talks about it and how hard this is. They only talk about the little years. And then losing your BF tragically. I cannot compare I do have my husband even if it’s a lonely marriage. I’m sure you have some trauma. Have you done any grief counseling? And it’s okay to not be okay. You went from a full life to one that’s very different. Being a mom is purpose filled kids left but you still had a future and was planning it with your BF and now it feels very different. You are grieving. And that is okay. Have you written down how you feel? Maybe try journaling put it on paper all the emotions sadness disappointment anger… all of it. Maybe one day you will feel like going on a walk or joining a single women’s traveling group or trying a new sport like pickleball or learning but take it in baby steps. Big hugs!

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