pregnant again
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Sorry, huge essay here! My mum always says she worried about splitting her love in two for me and my brother, but when I was born her heart just expanded to fit all the extra love she had now for me too. I get what she means now! In terms of coping, not gonna lie, it's HARD those first few weeks. I was in survival mode until about week 6, then we started to find systems etc that worked for our family. I'm lucky that my parents live close by, that's made a massive difference, but basically accept and use any help offered and find your people who make things easier or are going through the same stage and do it together. My antenatal group has got really close. I started to be able to look up again and realise that I was having these beautiful moments seeing my two babies together, my daughter dotes on my son and he smiles away at her, and realise that things were settling into a new normal and a routine and I was enjoying it all. It takes time but so worth it! Good luck with it all, you'll be brilliant! Xxx
Ooh also my big practical tip is to get a high chair for baby with a newborn recline (I got the Silvercross Buffet one) as it makes meal times with your older child a lot easier if you can put baby down at the same level for a bit. My wee boy didn't love it much at first of course, but from maybe 2 months he likes to lie in it and watch what's going on, and his sister chats away to him. Xxx
I have a close age gap! My daughter just turned two in November and my son is now three months old, 22 month gap between them. I felt exactly how you are describing when pregnant - I felt guilty that more of my thoughts were focused on my little girl and how her life would change and how she would cope and how I'd give her lots of attention still, then I'd feel guilty for not really thinking about the baby in the same way, but it was just because I didn't have a reference point yet for him I think, whereas obviously you know your first child inside out already. Now that he's here and I'm getting to know him, I absolutely adore my son and love him just as much as my daughter, albeit in a slightly different way for now as it's a different type of relationship at this early stage, more based on care taking and snuggles, than on that back and forth actual relationship you have with an older child who you can 'know' if that makes sense. Definitely room for all the love in my heart though!