Am I being stupid?

I was super close with my grandad growing up to the point he was the only person I looked up to in the entire world , I was also a later in life child for my mum (31) so lost my grandad at 19 , the hardest thing I have ever had to go threw but I’d go threw it 100 times over if it meant I had 19 years of having a best friend and being so loved by him, loss is hard but don’t take your baby away from them he’ll be grateful for the memories they leave

Death is an inevitable part of life. It’s going to be hard, of course. But your parents could have decades left. I would want those precious memories, personally. And the chance that my little one would remember them. I couldn’t cut them out/restrict their time together based on the ‘what ifs’. And, really morbidly. My husband and I could get into a tragic accident and die tomorrow. In that event, my boys are going to our parents. I want them to have the best relationship possible, for lots of reasons, but that is in the back of my mind too. They bring a lot of joy to eachothers lives. In a world like this, we need more of that. ❤️

You also can never know when someone will go. My dad died when I was 16 but his mum (my grandma) was 69 when I was born and lived to 96 ❤️I got to have her around until I was 27

You’re not being stupid for thinking about the mental wellbeing of your son, howeverrrr I don’t think spending less time with them would bring many benefits. Death is inevitable and a part of life, the best thing you can do for him is to be ready to help him grieve and consider placing him in therapy when the time comes, so that a professional can teach you how to help him process those emotions on his level that he’s at. As someone who lost their great grandmother at 18, it absolutely crushed me but even though I spent so much time with her growing up , I still cried for more time. To this day, I would give everything I own to see her one more time! You should let him spend as much time with them as possible , and stop worrying about the future cause truthfully, tomorrow is promised for no one regardless of age!! So love on them hard for every moment you both have ❤️ yall will get through it !

It will always be emotional when a loved one dies. My parents were quite old when they had me. I never met my dad’s dad and was around 8 years old when my grandma died (dad’s mum). As awful as it sounds, it was a lot easier when they passed than when my mums parents died in 2021 and 2023. The older you are, the harder it is in my opinion. You’re more emotionally aware, and also have so many more years of memories with them, so letting go is so hard. Xx

My dad died last year and I’m glad my oldest has some good memories of the time they spent together such as day trips to London and later on meals out when my dad was less mobile. My son was 15 and it did hit him hard however my 7 year old was very matter of fact about it even though she was sad. One of my dad’s greatest wish was that we all spent time together last Xmas even though he was very ill. There will be lots of times over the years where life will be challenging however your son will cope. He has to as it’s part of life x

One thing I will say is please don’t withdraw him from their lives, seeing him is probably a big highlight of their day as well. I know it will be difficult when they go but I would give anything for my daughter to have a relationship with mine and she isn’t able to, it’s breaks my heart. Don’t take that away from them because you want to try and make things easier. My grandmother passed away last year, she was in her 90s and it was the most difficult thing I’ve ever been through. She was a massive part of my life growing up. I still remember small details like when she took me out for my 5th birthday 20 years ago. Your son could also grow to cherish memories like that.

I think your feelings are valid. You just need to re-direct them to thinking let’s make as many memories as possible with them

My nana was 73 when I was born, I saw her almost everyday until I left home for university. Obviously when she died at 95 I was devastated, but now I have lots of happy memories to look back on. Don’t rob your child of those memories, like others have said your parents may very well have decades left!

definitely not stupid! it’s a completely normal thing to worry about - i think it’s important to teach him about death (in a child friendly way obviously!) so he’s aware of how it all works to maybe ease it? not for them specifically obviously, but in general x i know not everyone does.. but my great grandma is still alive at 105! you never know how long they have left! 🩷🩷

Don’t write them off yet . My grandads 92 alive and kicking . I would just educate my child about death and that grandparents are not around forever

I will always regret the fact that I didn’t know my grandparents as they died before I was born. He shouldn’t miss out on the happiness that’s there for him now over possible future sadness. Not anywhere in the same league as this, but will he also never know the love of a pet as it will die at some point? My parents are approaching their 80s. My children are 3 and 9 months. I’ve made the opposite choice and choose to build as many memories with them as I can and take lots of photos and video clips.

Don't keep him away, I treasure the memories I have with my grandparents. Love is definitely worth the pain of loss.

Don’t limit his time with them he should get as many memories as possible. My dad died when my oldest son was 7 but they had a great relationship and I’m so glad they did

Grief and death is a part of life if you shelter them from too much it could cause more harm than good in the long term

You’re not being stupid worrying about it but don’t lessen their time together as one day those memories are all he will have. You’ll just have to be ready to explain what happened and be there for him

No offence but you're not exactly exempt are you ... What I'm trying to say is , does that mean he should spend less time with you ?

I think the opposite, spend as much time as possible. My grandparents were in their early to mid 60’s when I was born, my grandad passed when I was 7 and grandma when I was 36. I have amazing memories of both of them. We still speak about grandad and how he read us stories and teased us about a troll living under a bridge in the park. Death is a part of life, no need to hide that from your kids

If it counts for anything, I lost one of my grandmothers when I was 5 and the other in my 20s. I suffered way more for the second one because I was able to understand better what death is, plus I got to see her health declining which wqs heartbreaking. So I think losing someone while young it's easier in a way

Thank you everybody for your understanding. I’m all honesty I was stupid for even asking if I should stop him seeing them as much because I knew I’d never do it, all I’d be doing is causing pointless upset now. It’s good to hear your experiences of losing grandparents as I was never that close to mine so I can’t really relate. I just know it’s going to be so hard but it’s nice to know I’m not stupid for feeling that way. I obviously always knew losing my parents would be horrible but it just feels even worse now thinking about how it’ll affect my child, I guess this is just another thing that comes with being a parent.

My mom is 70. I know they don’t have until adulthood with her so I encourage as much time with her as possible. I’m sure a big part of her happiness comes from them. Be in the moment and let them make memories.

It’s completely natural to worry about this, especially when you see how close your son is to his grandparents. But the bond they share is such a gift—for him and for them—and those memories will be a source of comfort and love for him in the future, no matter what. Limiting their time together might seem like a way to protect him, but it could also mean missing out on precious moments. Instead, focus on nurturing that connection and creating a strong foundation for when the time eventually comes. You’ll be there to guide him through any difficult feelings, and he’ll have the strength of those beautiful memories to hold onto.