Career and mom

Can you financially afford to?

I don't know for sure, we'd have to make some lifestyle changes for the long term (maybe downsize).

In todays economy it feels like it would a big risk. Especially if you have worked so hard to be where you're at. Again you also have to sacrifice a bit or risk things at times. Some never do anything about what they really want and then you're stuck and to late or old to do any changes. I would weight out the pro and cons. Don't ever rush to change and like previous comment can you afford. Economy very unpredictable and we all know it feels like everything is just going up.

Personally, I'm so grateful for our amazing daycare provider who allows me to feel comfortable that my toddler is happy and having fun with kids his age while I get to keep my professional skills sharp, engage with adults during the day, and bring an income in for my family that allows us to save for retirement, save for his future education, and provide extracurriculars for him. I'm super lucky to have a very flexible work environment though and I can take lots of time off to be with him. I think it's really about what you want to do with your time and what your child is like...mine would be bored of he stayed at home with me since he is very social and thrives on playing with other kids while I'm more introverted. Also, having a great care provider you trust makes a big difference.

Is there a way you could spend some more time with your kiddo but still work? Maybe a part time/reduced hours position, or if you work from home, could you have your child taken care of by a nanny so you could spend breaks/lunchtime with kiddo? Something like that? Just brainstorming. I love working, but it helps that daycare is very close by and I work from home so I still get some good time with her before and after work every day..

Hmm, thank you. I appreciate the questions and brainstorming. I feel I'm in the thick of it. My toddler isn't fully adapted to his daycare, and it's too far a drive. He and I used to go out daily for group activities, so he doesn't understand why I can be there at daycare, too. I don't quite feel like I need a break from him or that I'm burnt out from baby-duties yet, so I myself am not convinced there is a silver lining to this. Now, I start every day emotionally drained, and drop off is heartbreaking. I'm hyperfocused on each day, so I just wanted to think big picture. I agree that making a change in haste isn't that great. I'm going to give this some time and take some liberty with my work schedule, try not to feel guilty on both fronts 😕.

I quit my job after my mat leave and I have ZERO regrets. I was a lawyer who defended architects and engineers and then moved into construction project management. I loved my job. I loved my team and the company I worked for. But I couldn’t bring myself to go back after my mat leave and leave my son in someone else’s care. When I told my son’s pediatrician she said “Good for you. Raising your babies is a once in a lifetime opportunity.” She’s right. I don’t regret it at all. I love being home with him (and now his baby sister), taking them to classes and just spending time with them. There are some days that feel a bit isolating and there are some days that are downright hard to get through, but I think the little moments in our day make motherhood extraordinary. That being said, I left the company I worked for on great terms. I still talk to my former team members periodically so if I ever want to go back the door is always open!

Oh wow, that's so great to hear, I felt exactly the same! I had extended an additional 4 months after mat leave to be with my son and we had a great time. I am definitely worried about getting a job after a long break (past trauma lol). But I guess I gotta be brave sometimes and trust myself 😅 I want the freedom/time to focus on my kids at some point in the future and I have to find the right path that leads me there ❤️