Newly a single FT mum
Hi everyone, I never thought I’d be in this position but very recently I’ve become a single mum to my 5 month old and I’m completely overwhelmed with the next steps. We live together and my ex is moving out, he’s been staying with family for the past month already. I combi feed and our LO still has a good amount of breastfeeding, how do you work out splitting time in this situation? The thought of being away from LO is an awful feeling, but I don’t want to keep the dad from accessing his child either. I’ll be primary parent, and so far ex has been popping over to visit LO but that can’t really go on forever as we need more structure and routine with visits etc.
With finances, how on earth do you begin to work it out?! Luckily we rent, so no house selling or anything, but LO will live with me and I’ll continue to be a SAHM so how do you go about the money side of things? Due to pre existing chronic illnesses I already gratefully receive benefit support, though due to be reassessed soon I believe (being migrated over to UC), but I’m very low income on my own so I’m worried how we’re meant to work it all out.
Any advice would be so welcome, I’m heartbroken and confused how to work it out fairly when I’m feeling like all this is very unfair on me & LO (this wouldn’t have been my choice) 💔
Thank you so much
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Single person discount on council tax, also if your on low income this can also reduce your council tax more. if your relationship with your LO dad is amicable I’d say just talk to him about who sees your child when, and express it if your uncomfortable being without your child for long periods of time.
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I became a single mam when my son was 3 months old, my ex worked 5 days a week so he had our son on weekends, now I have my son everyday because of different situations. But we sat down and worked out an agreement that worked for both of us with my son so I’d say talk to him and negotiate how often you are okay with your son being away from you it’s recommended before 1 that a child sees each parents atleast every 2 days but obviously this may not work for everyone. I’m on benefits and live in a rented property and it’s literally just a case of budgeting everything out and figuring out what is going to work, it took me a couple month to figure out how much disposable income I had a month and what I needed for bills. I also really recommend going through child maintenance for payments off of your ex as if you’re the primary parent you are entitled to money off of him and it stops any arguments you may end up having in the future about it. UC will help a lot with your rent and apply for