Toddler doesn’t listen and I’m so fed up of it.

I really don't mean to invalidate your feelings but expecting a toddler to listen or know what they want is completely unrealistic. They don't have the brain development for that. I'm sorry it's such a struggle (I know it is) but perhaps the first thing to do is to try and reframe how you are thinking about your toddler instead of thinking that it's something they aren't doing that they should be - they are just being a toddler and it's something to accept. It won't be forever. Is there someone that can help you and give you a break every so often? X

Hello hun, I both agree and disagree with the above comment. Yes toddlers don’t fully understand BUT they do understand a little. They start to understand cause and effect at this age. My son’s turning 2 on the 19th and while I understand every child is different mine did start the “terrible two tantrums a few weeks back. U need to show them that there actions have consequences. We have hard wooden flooring through the house and he would throw his toys purposely because he likes the sound, which would obviously start leaving dents in the floor. Everytime he did this I would pack up his toys and put them away and explained it’s because of him throwing it. He would cry but I’d let him cry it out, obviously I’d console him. After a few days when I’d see he’s going to throw a toy I’d say do u want mama to put them away and he’d instantly stop. Same goes with tantrums, I started giving him “timeout” taking him away from the situation into another room.

In terms of the tantrums outside, I think once u get a handle on him at home, the outside situation should also improve. With toddlers it’s a constant power struggle so don’t beat urself up about it, it’s completely natural. My inbox is always open if u want to have a chat x ur doing amazing.

@HL I know you aren’t invalidating me I just don’t know what else to do. He asks for a banana so I will give him and banana and he will scream and throw himself on the floor. I don’t know how to try and reframe my thinking and be less angry and more patient I really have tried. I have no one that will give me a break because he is too hard work. His dad won’t even watch him so I can have a bath or a cup of coffee in peace because he just has tantrums when I’m not in the room. I’m just completely burnt out and feel like I have no idea what im doing x

@Fatima thank you for your advice I’m going to try it. It’s just getting to the point where I rather not leave the house because I’m so embarrassed by the tantrums x

Yeah I have that same thing with my little 1. Gonna be 2 next month, and definitely getting harder to deal with, plus being pregnant with baby no2. It’s the terrible twos, where it’s their only way of expressing their feelings/emotions and can’t communicate directly to us. Just got to be calm & whatever it is just let it be. It will soon pass. I feel for you. 💕🙂

My two year old started her tantrums early from before age 2 and I just think you still have to teach them right from wrong as they definitely have some sort of understanding. Selective hearing and choosing to do things when they want sometimes :D. Hopefully it gets better for you, I’d say just be persistent in giving into their needs e.g giving a snack to help calm them or even try offering an alternative and just explain why they can’t have a snack again or if dinner times coming up to eat dinner first. My little one usually plays up at meal times too for example but once left for a bit tends to go back to it and even if it’s cold at least she’s still eating. She also throws herself on the floor a lot when out and about but if she’s told I’m going she will soon come running or if I spot something of interest to her I’ll use it as a distraction just to get her to walk and even take her for a Quick Look. Just used some things as examples of my experience with tantrums

I think your partner needs to step up and help you more. I get the tantrum/upset when you leave but it won't last forever. He should go for a walk or do something fun for a few hours out of the house and give you a much needed reset. You deal with the tantrums so why can't he.