My bestfriends son is unbearable
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Yeah I’ve had this happen. I’ve started to dread hanging out with that friend and probably won’t anymore because I don’t want her son to badly influence mine in the future. It sucks. I love hanging out with her, but she always brings him along and I don’t want to feel annoyed by it because that’s her son, but his behavior is too much.
Sounds exhausting hanging out with her. I wouldn’t. That behavior will make anyone not wanna hangout again lmao
Dealing with the rebellion w my 3yo, only thing that makes them learn is following through (everytime one warning, two makes him think I’ll let it go) and talking to him about it how it’s gunna make others feel+how that’s gunna effect him “if you hit anyone, you’re going to be in trouble. when you hit, that’s being mean, when you’re mean, no one’s gunna play with you. You want to have friends and play, right?” I just talk to him and if he’s not listening/still being over the top then he will go somewhere to calm down before I talk to him before he can go back out to play
I try to make sure my kids are polite and good to kids they play with, I couldn’t imagine having a friend not caring. I know you have no control over what she does but I hope y’all stay friends cus idk if I could at a certain point
I didn’t have this happen with kids but with my aunt’s dog. Everytime we go to her house is such a stress as the dog barks at my 2 year old and she’s crazy frustrated and they don’t leash him or put him in a room or even do enough to keep the dog away from my daughter. It made me hate to go at their house. Now I know that’s a dog but for a child you can tell them off and keep them in line. I wouldn’t hang around my friend with a child like that as it would irritate me so much. But since she’s your bestie I think you can openly tell her that the child needs to be disciplined
It’s almost like you’re describing my little cousin, my uncle’s son. My uncle is older and the kid is mostly with the mom who’s a total pushover in many aspects. At family gatherings, it’s all the other parents (us older cousins) redirecting his little ass as he tornadoes through my parents house. He throws toys over the bannister, climbs furniture, locked another kid in a closet, sticks his tongue out, and runs away. His mom doesn’t even tell him to stop. She’ll just sit back and have a nice big glass of wine. Now when we see them rolling up, we warn each other: “Reece is here!” 😅 (That’s not his real name.)
Unless the child has some issues (adhd, autistic spectrum) the reason for his behaviour is his parents. But regardless of his issues, his mum shouldn't let him mess with things around your house, this is actually disrespectful towards you. I would tell her she is no longer welcomed with him into your house unless he behaves. Also 4 is not an excuse, he is old enough to understand. My son is 1.5 and we already started disciplining him, knows wat no means and knows where he's not allowed to go or touch around our house
If your friendship is worth it; have a conversation with her about how you feel and ask how she is doing and if there is anything you can do to help. Maybe she’s depressed, he’s undiagnosed or straight up unruly and it is hard to deal with that. As a part of her village help her out a bit if you can and she’s accepting to it.
This is not normal. It sounds like there might be something underlying going on with him. You could bring it up politely and with emphaty. Some parents don't seek help for many reasons and kids just get classed as difficult without figuring out what is happening. I understand how you feel and for the time being I would agree to meet her when her child is not around.
Tbh, if it’s exhausting for you, it’s probably even more exhausting for your friend. I would speak to her about it and ask what support u can provide. You can also establish boundaries to protect the safety of you and your child whilst doing so. She should understand.
Some of my friends for whatever reason I see them at night only no kids. I would keep this friendship to that for now. I do a night meet up weekly on like a Fri or Sat night. One peanut mama I’ve known for 6m we’ve done 4 meetups and each time her 9yr old was either at school or home w her Daddy I haven’t even met her kid yet (nor her mine) I’ve only chatted to her child on FaceTime. I regularly go to my besties from 6pm-12am and I leave my boy at home, and her child is upstairs w the partner, we have a girls night in downstairs at her house.
Id try and do play dates in a neutral area like a park or somewhere or stop doing them for a while until hes matured slightly. My son has asd and when he was that age id watch him like a hawk and even then he was nowhere near how you’ve described. I’d be horrified and very apologetic if that happened.