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@Rhiannon he’s just been weird like not understanding of our situation. He works 12 hours and I’m home with the baby but he wants to have sex immediately and a lot of times I put it off because he’ll ask when I’m in the middle of dealing with the baby so it’s not the best time. He would ask basically everyday and then just the other day it just stopped and I’ve been the one putting effort into it now and he seems less interested in it which is unlike him . And also he was showing me something on his phone and a message came up but it looked weird ( it was something I subscribed him for but completely forgot) but as soon as I clicked the message he got upset at me asking why I wasn’t watching what he was trying to show me and why did I chose in that moment to go through his phone . I told him I wasn’t just the message popped up and looked weird so I clicked it . But I don’t understand why he got so irritated fast . I’m not sure if I’m just looking just to look or it’s because I’m-
Scared that he might try to do what he did again. Especially since I’m a SAHM when he did it before I was in distress wondering what was wrong that I wasn’t doing for him . But I’ll probably ask him when he’s here about why he delete it
With a baby I can understand why you're not having much sex with him. In the middle of dealing the baby is a bit strange. Do you think he could have a problem? Seems to me he could be a sex addict. I do think something is going on after reading what you're saying it's odd behaviour. but I also do think you both need time together without the baby, have another deep conversation about this situation and try to think of a solution because if you're setting the boundary of porn is a huge no go then he should be respecting that boundary no excuses! see if he can seek help if he's addicted to porn/sex.
Just seen your next reply.. don't you ever think you need to give him anything to satisfy him! That's not how a relationship works!
@Rhiannon after the time he did it I asked him what was wrong and he admitted that he hadn’t been with anyone for a while so he’d use it to relieve himself and that it was hard to let it go cause he’s used it since he was a teen. I told him we could get him help but that I’d wouldn’t want to be in the relationship if it continued and after that it never happened again . I do think he is addicted to sex but he won’t admit it. I just don’t know how to go about it because I’m opposed. Randomly throughout the day he just would make sexual remarks which I told him became uncomfortable especially if I was just trying to have a genuine good time but now that he’s not doing any of that something just feels off . I don’t want to accuse him of doing it again because he says it’s something he’s embarrassed about but idk how to bring it up without causing a chain reaction
Like he overthinks it so he’ll question me for not trusting him and going through his emails then also get upset at me for thinking that he’s doing that
You shouldn't have to protect his feelings, you do need to chat to him about this otherwise it's going to go round and round in your head and you'll resent him for it. Sit down with him and chat, explain why you're asking him if he gets uptight and upset about it then you'll know then if something is going on or not
I know a lot of people are going to disagree with me but men are going to be men. And I don’t think they’ll ever stop even if you ask. Why not watch together? Make things a little interesting. I don’t know I guess for me I’d rather know my husband is doing it and either join him or just let it happen because I know that he obviously still wants me and not other women. But it could make things fun 😅🤷🏽♀️ just saying
I also think it’s kind of like using reverse psychology on them because I also found the motor. I said it was OK and even would watch it with him the less he even watched it after that anyway. And for me, it’s kind of relief because if I’m on my cycle or I’m just not in the mood and he is he can just go do his thing and come back. Idk, again I know it’s more of a taboo approach to the subject and a lot of other women may not agree but that’s just my take on it
I honestly think you're better off having another sit down with him and have another deep conversation ask him why. But if you're looking through his emails on a feeling he's doing it again then it's clear he might be, because well that feeling is never wrong.