Settling at nursery
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Mine started childminders last week (had 2 settling in days prior but they were short). I currently hate drop offs coz he gets really worked up. Makes me so anxious from the night before and then while we’re walking there. He recognises the walk there now so moans half way when he realises where we’re going and then full on cry session once we’re outside the house. I wanted to cry yesterday. They message me 2 minutes later every time and show he’s absolutely fine but I hate we can’t enjoy the walk together. Doesn’t help he only attends Tuesdays and Thursdays atm plus as I work in a school we’re off for the next 2 weeks!! I’m hoping he’ll soon enjoy it coz he does love it once he’s there and he’s only there for 4 hours. I am dreading September where he will be in nursery 4 mornings until lunchtime! Luckily we haven’t had any pushbacks at home (yet!) if anything he’s so tired from the day he’s in bed earlier! Hope your daughter settles in soon xx
My son started last month and doing the exact same.
3 Months to consistently not be teary on drop off and pick up He was 13mths old and went 5 days a week
Our LG has been at nursery about a year now and recently started similar behaviour, it lasted about a month and now she’s back to loving it but things we did to help were: - talking about our plans for the day and acknowledging if she said she wanted to stay home (but still that we had to go - like sometimes I want to stay at home too 😂) - chatting to the nursery workers and seeing what she loved to encourage her in, like listening to a song or wearing a fancy dress costume, also seeing if her key worker could be the one to take her in - if an option alternating drop offs between me and dad so all the emotional stress wasn’t just on one of us - letting her choose her own outfits to wear there - having a snack for the way home - having an earlier quite structured bedtime routine for nursery days - we found they were so busy she’d get tired much more quickly and bed time was more of a battle Sorry that’s a bit of an essay but hope it will help! X
@Rory thank you for your reply!
@Shazida it’s so hard isn’t it. I can’t even look at her bag without her saying ‘no nursery’ and it makes me feel so guilty. My poor girl has gone from nothing to 2 half days and 2 long days so it’s been a lot for her: I hope it gets better for you too!
@Kay thank you for the reply. Good to know it’s not just us!
@Francesca thank you!
@Xanthe bless her that so heartbreaking. It is hard for them and us as parents! Thank you xx
It is hard especially when you have to leave and they’re still upset. Mines been going since he was 11 months…some days were really hard but after a couple months it got better. However, even now at this age we get the odd morning where he has a sad face when I say good bye, but within 10 minutes I can see a pic of him on the app loving life. I found he wouldn’t be upset if dad took him, it was just me 🫠
@Alice thank you this is super helpful. I never know what to do about telling her we’re going etc. I don’t want to get her worked up early for no reason, especially when she’s going in the afternoon but I also don’t want to hide it from her. I never lie if she asks me though. I’m also trying not to mention it too much before I get her in the car as I think she’ll fight to get in the car seat and that will be so much harder. I have tried to ask her about her day, but she doesn’t want to talk about it at the moment so I’m hoping that will come!
@Sophie ah that’s interesting about dad! Sadly I have to take her every day, but he does pick her up for me. I think she would likely be similar!
I’d say a few weeks, she was mostly okay going in after the first 2 weeks, but would cry on pick up. The meltdown at home could be tiredness too, do they still nap at nursery etc? Could just be overwhelmed from the day. My girl still occasionally has a bit of a meltdown on the way home - i think just from such a busy long day. Fingers crossed it passes soon for you
It took a few weeks for our little one to not cry anymore. And I’d say about 3 months for him to be fully settled. That being said he started nursery a lot younger at 8 months old.