Is it normal for me to be upset? How should I tackle this?
Show your support
Focus on making your husband understand what really happened and that you're there for him. Share you're concerned unhelpful remarks will drive a wedge. You'll probably need to show your being authentic by just saying it's a lot to juggle but you fully commit to the arrangements as in the long run it's best for your family unit. If you can bear to, let her know she's adding to the strain
Honestly I dislike reading these type of situations because if it was the other way around and mom was injured or going through things mentally she’d still be expected to stay home and be there for EVERYONE else and help. He could still be at home even to support you with what he can or the kids know he is still around. And to top it off for his mom to say anything at all about the situation when she could be reaching out to support you instead and ask if she can take the kids to help or something is just shitty and I would definitely let her know. Even for her to come over to care for the kids so you can run errands and maybe get a little break by yourself for an hour or two. People/family are so quick to attack or come after moms and yet be so lenient and more compassionate towards dads for bare minimum effort or support when they go through things but not the same at all for moms.
And she’s probably not helping the situation as she’s enabling her son by babying him further instead of figuring out how to help him with HIS children too. I’d voice this to her over the phone or text, doesn’t have to be rude but that’s just how I am personally. Dad can be down and out but then the “village” or his mom needs to step up for her grand children and figure out a way to help. And if she has any brain cells at all, by you telling her this she wouldn’t hesitate to start helping you out more and that’s even by picking up the kids to go see and spend time with dad if needed at her house. Good luck, hugs and strength to you during this time! 🩷
I feel like you and husband need to be on the same page about these things. That's not okay for her to say and I'd want to know my partner was in agreement with me about that.
@Meghan well she kind of did, but not sure how severe or what happened in the relationship exactly, but her husband did have mental health and issues and she left ( but think things got extreme).
i would ignore her
Sorry, but… Women deal with mental health issues, spine, etc and still have to get on with it. Most don’t move in with mommy either. 🤷♀️
I think I would’ve made a snide remark like “so that’s what you did since that’s what moms do huh? Your kids hate you after you left their dad and found someone new at work?” I don’t stand for bullshit like that personally and will dish whatever she served 10 fold.