in October 2023 Babies 🇬🇧

Is anyone else feeling like this still?

I’ve been feeling this way since my October baby was born (first baby). It has got slightly better but still having a significant impact on my wellbeing. When I’m around her, I CANNOT relax. I am on edge all of the time, even when she’s happily playing and I’m just watching her in the sofa, even when she’s asleep! I’m ashamed to say that I am constantly seeking time when I can give her to someone else so they can be responsible for her- even if it’s just ten minutes, and it’s all because I just need some relief from this on- edge feeling. My husband left me when I was 8 weeks pregnant (I’m sure that has something to do with it, but isn’t the root cause). He is very much in her life and looks after her a couple of evenings a week and has her overnight at weekends too. I look forward to the time when she’s with him so that I can finally relax. I’m so ashamed of feeling this way, I love her so so much, but a lot of the time I don’t enjoy spending time with her because of this feeling. I know that therapy is the answer and I need to seek it, but I’m just wondering if anyone else has this experience?

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Hey, I felt the exact same for a while also! (My baby is now 8 weeks) I think its just down to how demanding his needs are, in terms of everything he needs (feeding and comforting mainly) but I literally make notes of all of his feeds and when he should be due a next feed, and I've started to take note of when he usually feeds and sleeps (particularly the Bedtime ones) just so I can feel abit more in control of my time so that I don't feel completely consumed by keeping up with his needs, even though I love it! I wonder if your on-edge feeling is something to do with not feeling in control?

I think this is quite normal. I was the same with my first baby. It was like I could never chill and relax and could never switch off. I can’t remember how long I felt like it for but honestly try not to feel guilty. It’s so new to you so of course it’s going to be hard x

I would speak to your GP or health visitor, sounds like it could potentially be postpartum anxiety. It's pretty common but not 'normal' so could be something you can get help with 🙂

To an extent yes. But I relax when he is napping, not the entire nap. I still ridiculously check his breathing probably every 20 mins but apart from that I enjoy his nap as "me time" and make sure to not do any chores during it ! I hope therapy will help you and sorry that you got left while pregnant 😥 he didn't deserve you

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