So happy for you to be home now with your son. I think this feeling is so common, my daughter is one and I still get very anxious. If you look for Miracle Moon on Instagram, she has so many resources and practical advice re managing things in and out of NICU, especially around anxiety. I would recommend having a look there. I did a health anxiety course which also helped me and came up with some coping strategies. Keep talking about how you are feeling and message me if you want to chat, I understand! Xxx
I’m so sorry you had such a difficult time but so happy for you being home now and staying your life at home. I’ve been using the birth trauma association who have really helped me just taking control of what happened to us and would recommend. Also you can speak to your health visitor and they can get you further support if you need to. From a practical point of view, I got the owlet dream sock, I was so used to her having the monitor on at the hospital that I couldn’t sleep without knowing she was being monitored, it is pricey but I can’t recommend it enough for the peace of mind. I hope things start to ease for you quickly, you’ve got this mama and so happy for you having your baby safe at home with you.