MIL Problem

Am I overreacting with the situation? A typical day of our life is, my MIL helped out to take care of LG when husband and I are at work. But recently my LG is not feeling well, and my MIL keeps on saying that its good to bring her outside and enjoy the weather. I told her nicely 3x that we will take her outside after she’s feeling well. Little did i know, when i left the room to get ready for work, my MIL bring her outside, and clearly i have stated that I dont want LG to be out. I was so furious, i called my husband and he talked with her. She tried to defend herself saying that she thinks that its ok if its just the backyard. Long story short, she told us that she does not want to take care of LG anymore because im a difficult parent and im so strict to her, but she also has the audacity to still ask my husband to come over and stay the night whenever she feels like it. I told my husband that would be a problem for me. So am I overreacting with the whole situation? Should I just turn my head away and let her do her thing with LG since she’s helping out?

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You’re not overreacting at all! She clearly can’t follow rules/boundaries and then threw a tantrum when you called her out so clearly she can’t be trusted

The only problem is, im not ready to put my LG to daycare since she has dairy allergies and i tried once putting her in daycare and her allergy came back (assuming she’s sharing snacks with other babies)

She’s taking care of her grand baby for free so she’s doing you a favor don’t forget that

So technically its not for free, she lives with us, and we also buy her all the stuff that she needs (foods, vitamins, lotion, clothing,etc). I dont honestly count that as a “pay” we’re just being nice and providing her needs.

Idk, I empathise that this seems to be something that is important to you but depending on the illness I don't know that this is a hill I would die on? Like if I'm with my daughter all day and we can't get out of the house for days in a row I will struggle, unless she's particularly ill I'll definitely still be leaving the house! Fresh air doesn't do any harm, I always hear older generations talking about how good fresh air is lol so she might think she's helping?Obviously I'm missing the bigger picture and there is the concern that if she doesn't listen to this, what else would she ignore? So I couldn't say for sure but with what I know I think I'd probably let her take the child outside - as long as the child is happy and having fun!

Thats true. I guess its one thing after another, because she’s also willing to meddling in on how to discipline my LG. We are trying to teach her a thing or two and she started crying so grandma would just get in the middle of it. And i just feel disrespected by that. Idk its hard to figure things out. We have a system where we still take care of lg (giving baths, feeding her cause husband works from homw, changing diapers, etc) so we only ask her to take care of her while my husband is in a meeting or cleaning/cooking.

I personally think you are overreacting & that she was 100% right when she said that it didn't matter if it was just the backyard. Now, if she had taken your little girl to a park or anywhere else further away from your home whilst she was poorly, then I could understand. But she was in her own garden, so I really can't see the problem. Sometimes, some fresh air can help them to feel better. Also, she is doing you a favour by looking after your little girl.

I would be upset cause my MIL gave my nine month old whipped cream after I said no sugar. And when I called her out on it, she said it doesn’t have sugar and I had to show her the ingredients. I wouldn’t deal with it. It can lead into the kid not listening

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