Mixed feelings about having another child

Me personally, I don’t want another child and I’m the middle child of 3 siblings. I love my siblings, but your child having a sibling isn’t going to automatically make their lives better or less lonely. Times are different now, and raising children isn’t what it used to be. I don’t think it’s wise to have another kid just for your child to have a sibling if it’s going to make things more difficult for you—Especially if you’re more than likely going to be the primary caretaker of both kids. A lot of ppl think if you’re an only child, you’re automatically screwed bc of presumed loneliness. We can’t always predict the trajectory of someone’s life, so weigh your options and do what’s best for you and your daughter ❤️

So I personally did this. I was one and done, had diagnosed fertility issues (endo)and had my second only because I was pressured by husband at the time and family. BUT I couldn’t imagine life without him. My younger son is so different from my older, and honestly a big balance between me (fiery mama) and his brother, a total Gemini chatterbox who can fill the whole room with his personality. I am SO glad I had him. I love his personality, his idiosyncrasies, just to watch him be his own little person. Now I’m having a third 13 years later and I also wouldn’t have it any other way. If you know for sure, that’s okay too! It’s a lot of work. But don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want.

Your child will always be missing out on something, because you can't have all of the life experiences in only one life. If she had a sibling, she'd miss out on the awesomeness of having all of your parents focus and attention that only children enjoy. Make the right choice for you and your husband and your unique lives. ✨️

I'm sort of with you right now. 34. Had my baby in December and she's my whole world. I always wanted at least 2 kids and thought for a long time I wouldn't be able to have any. I didn't have to do ivf, but pregnancy wasn't enjoyable even if mine was shockingly uneventful until her birth. We spent 17 days in the nicu. I'm 10 months postpartum and still struggling with hip and pelvic problems/pain. Not to mention PPD is rough. I'm not sure if I can physically or emotionally handle another baby. I think in the end you need to make the decision that's physically and emotionally best for you. Your babies (no matter the number) deserve a momma who can be therefore them.

We had our first at 37. Has to do fertility treatments too. We decided we'd like another but weren't going to push it. Basically, didn't want to do fertility treatments again cause I hated those. We said we'd try and if a baby came without going to fertility that was great, but otherwise we'd be done with 1. I'm 40 and due in December with our second. This pregnancy is going easier than the first (no gestational diabetes this time!) although being pregnant with a toddler is no joke. The expense of more kids is definitely a thing, especially if you don't have family nearby. So that's something to really consider. I think if you decide you want another kid and can space them out a little more (cause day care is one of the biggest expenses, srsly) so that you don't have both in day care at the same time or only have them both in day care for a bit, it might be easier for your finances.

In a similar position and from people that I know who are solo children and have asked them. Some have been adamant they would have loved a sibling. Others have said they enjoyed getting sole attention from their parents. Do what you feel is best for you and your mental health. There’s always cousins!

Time will tell! I had a ridiculously stressful pregnancy and some serious issues with fibroids. I said I wouldn’t have another. But guess what, now I want another lol. Give yourself grace…and consider the health implications.

I have yet to hear a story where parents ever regret having a second child or more. I always hear second guessing to have another baby but never regretting…