Would you get your husband a Christmas gift if he didn’t get you a birthday gift?

Backstory, My husband birthday was back in August, a few weeks before our baby birth. I took him out for breakfast, lunch and dinner in 3 different spots. I’ve been talking about how I was excited to have my first birthday with our baby and that I want to go out since we haven’t been out since the baby birth. Came my birthday a few days ago, he didn’t take me out. He didn’t plan anything at all. He just bought dinner and a small cake from Walmart. He said he didn’t have money to do anything but mind you he is saving money to buy a new drone because he sold his old one. I was so hurt. He worked on my birthday which is totally fine, but he came back, he didn’t even help with the baby on top of not doing anything to make the day special for me. I was planning on getting him Christmas gifts but now I don’t feel like doing it anymore and use the money to spoil myself. Am i wrong?

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You’re only wrong if you don’t communicate how you feel

Maybe get him something small? And if he makes a comment I personally would say the same response he gave you. Also maybe have a convo with him for new years regarding expectations for the new year. How to save, how you want to do holidays (birthdays included). I know it sucks having to have these convos but maybe it will help put things into perspective?

I second having a conversation with him about what you'd each like or expect in terms of gifts for birthdays and holidays. At first hubs and I tried doing surprises but we just didn't get things we liked. Now we each get a budget for birthdays and a budget for after Christmas to get ourselves gifts, since our money is all together anyways, and we get things we want. Just an idea😊 but definitely sit down and have a conversation about what you'd each like so everyone knows what's expected and what would be appreciated and no one is left feeling hurt. He won't know you're hurt unless you say something.

Let him know how this made you feel. He didn’t forget your bday but he did not plan it according to your preference. Not making excuses but sometimes men aren’t as good as planning bdays.

What has he been like with your previous birthdays? If he’s never made any effort before, why did you expect any different this time round? You need to have a conversation with him ASAP about your expectations around birthdays and holidays in general. Make sure he gets the memo that it’s very important to you and you like the princess treatment. Nothing wrong with that AT ALL. He just needs to know. You should have had this convo with him when you first got together. If however after you’ve had this convo with him and let’s say next year he doesn’t bother again, sorry to say but he doesn’t care about you and you then need to decide if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone like that.

I think if you don’t get something in revenge then it’s going to cause more issues. You need to sit him down and say how it made you feel etc

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