Marriage...

Me and my husband have never argued. This was before our baby came along. As soon as baby has come along, all we do is be horrible and argue. It's always "I did this so you can do that" Or "I bathed him last night so you can do it tonight" Very tit for tat. I sometimes sit and think what life would be not being married to him anymore. I dont know If I'm just really bloody bored. I don't know if it's me. I don't know if it's all just Abit much and my husband just doesn't get it. But I'm going back to work this week, and I know it's going to be hard. I don't know if now I'm going back if it will help or what. I just feel so miserable. I love him. And sometimes I'm like. Why did I worry and stress. But sometimes he absolutely does my head in. I thought by now things would have evened out. But it's just doing my head in!! People at the start told me it would get better.. But I'm just bored of the arguments.
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We're in the same boat. He's always "why can't you take her" after I've spent the past 12 hours plus all night sorting her out. Or a "that's your job" like dude she's our baby not just mine just bloody well look after her for some of the yucky bits too. It's been driving me nuts and when I try and speak to him about it he uses work as an excuse it really gets under my skin then he wonders why I'm so grumpy. We're not married but defo in the same boat

I'm pretty sure they say the first year after having a baby is the hardest on relationships - we're 3/4 of the way there Mama! I get it, my partner and I argue more now than we did before we had our little one, it's so tough. I think it's so easy to slip into it becoming a bit of a competition of who's done what etc, maybe it's worth speaking to him to try and have an open discussion of being aware you're both doing it and try to combat it. Try and spend some quality time together, even if it's an hour a night after baby's gone to bed, no phones etc to try and reconnect and remember why you got married. I think its hard for the partners if they go to work everyday, to really understand what its like at home, because it's easy to think they're at home all day it must be easy, but we know it isn't, communicating that isn't always easy though. Just try and talk to him, and be patient, I believe things will and do become easier, just got to be patient 💕

Thanks ladies. Honestly I just think sometimes it's just us going through the absolute shit. I'm not glad others are in the same boat, it's just nice to know your not alone with it! And it's not just you!!! I'm hoping once I go back to work and when we get home it'll feel more 50/50 since I won't be with him all day anymore. I might feel like I want to do it with not being with my little boy all day! I hope you guys feel better soon with it all too!!! Who knew it would be so hard 😭

@Ebony this!! It’s the ‘you get paid to do it’ that gets me 🤣

@Shannon "get paid what though" is usually my reply 🤣

I think a lot of it is also the other half understanding the exhaustion that goes on in our heads. We have to think of anything, and everything and we can’t really shut off. I don’t know about others but the constant ‘extra’ thinking I have to do is exhausting itself and it can deffo play a role in arguments. Communication is key. And we know that going to work is a break. I think once LO goes to nursery a lot of the ‘thinking’ is lifted and it should become a lot easier.

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