Nursery

My boy started at 21 months, the first few weeks we had a lot of tears when we dropped him off and picked him up, never seen him cry that hard before but he was fine as soon as we left, After a few weeks he just stopped crying and would just run in happily and barely look back. He absolutely loves it now and is so happy to go.

Thank you for your response, yeh same as us never seen my lo cry or be so withdrawn I feel like I’ve traumatised her 😭 I didn’t know the procedure was for them to just rip them out your arms

It's been 1yr and she still cries most times 💔

My little boy is starting when he is 3. Unless you work, I don't see the need to send your children before the age of 3.

@Rachel I agree, I’ve recently went back to a part time job

@Katy 😢

That is fine because you work. It's the people who send their kids to nursery before the age of 2 "to get a break" that annoy me.

@Rachel it's the people who use an app designed for connecting and supporting other mums to make judgemental comments who annoy me 🤷‍♀️

Mine started at 18 months and it was pretty horrific for the first 6 or so weeks 🥲

@Sophie I wasn't even talking to you, so whatever 🤷‍♀️

@Rachel everyone deserves a break even if they don't work. You don't know people's story 🙄

I'm sorry this sounds so tough 😔 no, the procedure shouldn't be for them to rip them out your arms. There should be a slow transition process, gradually helping little one to get more used to nursery staff, with a proper goodbye to you. A short, positive goodbye is best. I actually planned for my son to start at 23 months, but on the second settling in session I realised like you that it was a difficult age in terms of him being fully aware that I'm going but not why, etc. I only had one goodbye to him which was traumatic and I decided there wouldn't be another one, not yet. But I'm lucky enough to be able to postpone going back to work. I know that's not an option for most. I would listen to your gut, if you're not happy with the handover process, how the staff are, or if your baby doesn't bounce back from being withdrawn, perhaps consider looking at a different setting, and seeing if they have a policy of more stays and plays before you're expected to start leaving your child there. Good luck x

My boy started at 9 months so we never had an issue with settling HOWEVER at age 2 he transitioned into the 2-3 room and it was awful for the first few weeks. I felt so so bad. But like the others have said, once they get used to it it’s absolutely fine and they will get to the point that they stroll in and don’t look back. Your baby will make friends with the other kids and the staff so quickly and you will be so proud at how resilient they will become, it just takes time. Also depends on how frequently they attend. My boy goes 5 days, 7:30-6pm so didn’t have too many issues. @Rachel sometimes I take a sneaky annual leave from work and still send him in 😂. He loves it though and good for his routine and for me to get some much needed downtime! X

@Chelsea that's fine as he goes anyway because you work & it's part of his routine 😊 x

@L 💜 get a babysitter for a few hours then. Don't send them to a nursery all day when they don't need to be there before the age of 3.

That age can be tough. Could be separation anxiety that is making it so hard. Those that start earlier tend to have an easier time but that’s not always the case either. My daughter started when she was 2 and never even looked back at me when I dropped her off, lol. My son started at 1 and cried some every morning for a good month 💔 he has his days where he cries still. Every child is different but hang in there…it should hopefully get better soon. And yes, they tend to like to rip the bandaid off bc the longer you linger around, the harder it is for the child apparently.

Thank you for your responses I think I was just a bit naive and really believe in a slow gradual process, my daughter has been with my mother since I started work but we did it very slowly few hours an afternoon a full day etc and she has never sat and cried for two hours with her I know a grandparent is different bcos she knows her but I thought I’d be able to stay for a bit then leave her longer each time