I really need to Rant, but I need to share this...

I wanted to share my experience so far… I really need to get this off my chest. I’m 9 weeks and 5 days today, and this is the furthest I’ve ever come after 4 early miscarriages. Here’s what I’ve experienced with the EPU and my midwife so far: Last week, I went for my 9-week scan. Instead of being seen by a sonographer, I was seen by a nurse who had completed training for scans. When she started scanning, only a few minutes in, she said, “I can see the baby and the sac, but there’s no heartbeat. I’m sorry. I’ll need to do an internal scan and call a colleague to verify. In the meantime, I’ll continue checking to give you some time.” I was in tears, heartbroken, but deep down, I kept thinking, I know my baby is fine. I kept telling myself, Come on, my love, show us your heartbeat. Then, the nurse suddenly said, “Oh wait, wait! I can see the heartbeat! It’s all fine, sorry!” She measured, and the baby was measuring at 9 weeks and even moving! It turns out, because I’m not slim, the baby was a bit deeper, and she couldn’t see the heartbeat at first. I understand mistakes happen, but she rushed to tell me there was no heartbeat so quickly—I was absolutely shocked and traumatised. Now, fast forward to today. I sent a text to the midwife from my GP, asking a question about vitamin D. She had previously told me I’d need to start taking it after 12 weeks. Her reply to my text was: “It will be done closer to the time, congratulations. Take the vitamin D from 12 weeks. If you get to 12 weeks, let me know and I’ll request it again.” I mean… what the actual f***? If I get to 12 weeks? Could you be any less empathetic? As someone who has had 4 miscarriages, how do you say something like that? There are so many ways to communicate that without being so blunt. I’m a nurse myself. I work in a hospital, and I always measure my words carefully because I know how anxious patients can be. The last thing you want to do is add more stress to them. Anyway, sorry for the rant, but I just needed to share this. Thanks.