Should I stick with it??
Show your support
4 is pretty young for forced sports. Take this with a grain of salt, because I'm not Mom of neurotypical kids, but I will never force sports or structure beyond my children's comfort levels. There is time for learning sports and the like, and it doesn't have to be this early.
This seems like a “you know your kid best” moment! I’d hate to watch my son lose an interest like this but also knowing that he need structure! Maybe try by giving him more of a transitional period between activities and that may be a good step in the right direction without him feeling too “forced”
Kinda went through the same with my son. He is now 5 and doing much better. We tried skiing last year and I really did not enjoy it. He would not listen to us on how to put his legs like pizza or anything. He wanted to do his own thing. I think prek has helped him to learn to take his turn, and listen more. He is doing so much better. We put him on snowboard lessons this year for 8 weeks and he had the best time. Maybe the transition is to do an individual sport where he is still with other kiddos but it is also drive by play time and not so structure. We also put him in gymnastics for a couple of sessions, and we saw him improve so much. Waiting in line, taking his turn, listening to instructions. The teacher was just amazing, so patience. I also think at this age is very important to focus on more free play and explore, this is when they developed all their basic skills like runnning, jumping and throwing that will be the base for specialize sport skills. Good luck momma!
Just a little more back story. Something with more structure was recommended by his preschool teacher because he has doesn’t like following directions at school either. I’ve tried different things like gymnastics and soccer and took him out after the first week because of the way he responded to it after realizing there will be direction and not just running around/free play. From age 1-3 he LOVED coloring, writing and drawing. He has an easel in his room for this reason. Coloring and writing always kept his attention, but since starting school he doesn’t want to write anymore because he feels its work. When he was able to write how he wanted it was fun but the moment the teacher started telling him the correct way to write, all of a sudden I have a hard time getting him to color or write. He hasn’t used his easel(that he used to love) since October(he started school in September). So that’s a little back story that I haven’t included. HE JUST DOES NOT LIKE STRUCTURE.
It sounds like he may benefit more from a Montessori or Reggio-Emilia preK environment if those are available to you. It was great for my oldest, who I think would have struggled in a more structured environment when younger. She has adapted to public school kindergarten fine, thankfully. My 4yo is in a regular preK now and doesn't do great with more structured activities either. We haven't found a sport/team activity he will participate in either. We're going to try T-ball this summer. It feels like potentially a good mix of individual and team? We'll see. He does soccer at the preK 1/wk, but I think it's more little games type of drills so it's fun. I think/hope it's just a developmental age thing where they are asserting their independence and testing boundaries by being resistant. I don't think there's anything wrong with pulling him from an activity that is taking the joy out of something he previously loved.
Maybe have a schedule with “your choice”, “follow the rules”. Give him a heads up so he knows exactly what will be his way and what he needs to listen and follow rules with. You can show him and express times you’ve felt that way and how you go thru it. Each kid is different so it’s hard to know what’ll work for yours
My son tried basketball out at age 3 and it didn’t go to well honestly he just wanted to run around and chase the ball, at 3.5 we tried baseball and he enjoyed it much better although he still wasn’t completely following all the rules I would just say find something where he can have fun for now , they’re still so young for true structure so I think it’s all about finding something they can enjoy and use that energy.
Maybe basketball just isn’t his sport. But obviously, yes he will have to learn patience, taking turns, and following directions at some point.