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It's so easy to lose yourself in motherhood but you can't pour from an empty cup. You have to find a way to recharge and refill. It's okay to have a messy house right now and to live a very simple life. Let the to do list pile up and keep reminding yourself that this is just a chapter in your book and that it goes fast. It helps to have people to vent to... if you don't have people you feel comfortable venting to in your life feel free to message me.
You are in the trenches of the early years and still trying to find your rhythm... and that's okay! Give yourself time and grace. It gets easier when your kids become more independent as they age. It is normal to feel absolutely drained at the end of the day, no matter how old your kid(s) are. As a special needs mom/occasional solo parent with no support, keeping a routine/schedule helps out a lot. It helps me stay on top of chores (which you shouldn't put too much pressure to keep up with in the early stages), gives my kids structure, and I schedule some self care if I manage to stay awake after the kids are asleep. If you don't set aside time or find moments to care for yourself (ex. listen to podcasts while doing chores, read books or work on embroidery while waiting to pick up my kids, take showers while kids are sleeping, etc.), self care will not happen. Keep in mind you are giving your kids the best quality care they can have, as nobody will care for them as much as you will. You are doing great!
It's so normal to feel this way. If the whining is less out of the house, spend more time outside. When my daughter was little, I'd pack up purees/milk/snacks and stay at the park for hours. I'd bring a beach towel for eating, then let her walk through an open field. When you're at home, put an earplug in one ear so the volume doesn't drown out your thoughts. Don't expect to be as productive as you were before baby, and don't let your husband expect it either. You would start to get pockets of time back right around 18mo, but you'll have another baby. But take heart, and know you will be able to pee alone again one day. When the whining gets bad, try just spending the time with your kid. They usually need less than you think. Consider trying a hip seat. It's harder with a bump, but possible, and might be great when baby 2 is old enough. Have your husband agree to a shower schedule so you get enough without having to ask every time. On a bad day, call a friend and have a good chat...
At this age yeah they really start teething so you may find they can be clingy from time to time. Yes sometimes being touched or whined at does get grating but I just tell myself baby is only little and I'm everything to him. He eats in his chair at my eye level so there is good interaction there. If I really want to read I'll read my book out loud to him etc etc If I want to go shopping I'll pop him in the buggy and go ☺️ you'll get your rhythm again
Sounds like you got some good comfort and advice already. Pregnancy exhaustion is real!! Not that parenting itself isn’t exhausting too. As for when it gets better, depends on the kids and you, but I noticed some light at the end of the tunnel more often when new baby was around 6 months old
Thank you ladies for your support. I’ll keep pushing 💕
The early days and even years are so so hard. Days are long but years go fast. Before you know it you will have a toddler. My 3.5 year old is still a handful but he now plays and reads independently, which gives me time to get things done. It's not as bad now as when my son was under 1 but I still end every single day completely mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted. Yes, it's very normal to feel this way. This is just my opinion...., but what I've observed is the really good mothers are exhausted by the end of a day. The careless and neglectful mothers seem to just breeze through. You're exhausted because you're being present and there for your little ♡ Do you have support? If so, start asking for more help...and regular help.. Ask the person(s) you trust the most (husband/ mom/sister/best friend/neighbor etc) to start watching your kiddo for 1hr a day alone so you can just rest and be you ... go for a walk, listen to music, take a bath-whatever you find relaxing.