MIL hates me but loves others!

1/? As a sensitive, physically and mentally challenged person, I’m going to say there is only one answer that will ever help. It isn’t easy, it isn’t bulletproof, and it takes work. MILs and DILs have had difficult relationships throughout the ages. There is a reason there’s so many jokes about it and stories about it on shows, plays, movies and books. There’s a reason and the reason is a bit irrational. It has nothing to do with you. Usually. In fact, unless you find that most of the people around, you are upset with you, you can mostly be assured that it’s not you. Mothers have generally had a different relationship with their sons than they have with their daughters. You can feel much more like their sons are being taken away from them. No matter how nice their daughter-in-law is. A child comes into the picture and of course you and the mother are the one that gets to make the choices and be with the baby the most, as it should be. Since it’s heavily frowned upon in society…

There are a lot of other things that come up. And often times they aren’t even aware of it. But they miss that relationship with their sons in it away. They are jealous of your relationship with their grandchild. I don’t have a good relationship with my mother-in-law either and honestly that’s hard on me because I’m already isolated from Family and I don’t have much and I have a strong desire to be liked and to be part of a family . Unfortunately my family award origin is unhealthy and so is my baby dad’s family. Could I have chosen better? I mean, yeah. But I would never trade the baby girl that I have now . In the end, the only advice that works for you for me and for all daughter-in-law’s … is to just love yourself and be the best to you that you can be. Wish your mother-in-law well from a distance and work on not needing her approval. It’s not easy, but it’s possible.

In the end, having the psychological understanding of why these things happen, doesn’t make the pain go away or the difficulty, but it does make it a little bit more easier.

I think it teaches us how not to act when we become MIL ourselves. For some reason my MIL hated me from the beginning too and I always said will it take a grandchild to be civil. But that didn’t work. I gave her two beautiful grandchildren and she still hated me. She didn’t show interest in seeing the kids and died without meeting her granddaughter. She adored her son in law and requested he come when she was about to die. Her wish at the end was my husband divorce me and I was banned from her funeral. Some MILs are just crazy. If you have a good family yourself who are great with your kids and love them then just forget about her. She is the one missing out.