feeling bad for missing life before kids..

Honestly I feel that. I was the same way when I first had my daughter at 20. Seeing everyone else has more freedom was hard and all but for me the more I got into motherhood the less I’ve come to miss my party days. I’m now 22 and some days I still feel like I don’t know who I am but I feel as though I’ve grown to be a better person then before I had my daughter

I still see friends weekly. I still go for dinner and drinks, birthdays, hens, date nights. I still drop by the club every now and then but we go to Latin and Afrobeats clubs these days so my taste in music has changed and it’s a much more varied crowd I see people up to 70yrs there, dancing salsa. I don’t need to be home by 8 because Hubby is able to put the baby to sleep but I do need to home by 1 which is when he woke for his night feed (before 18m) and by then my boobs were engorged anyway, even after pumping once. When they don’t need your help (or hubby can put them to sleep) or when they sleep through, I find I have much more freedom at night to stay out longer. So it’s only a phase, a “season”, really. Where we can’t go out as much. And then they get easier to put to sleep, start sleeping through, and that’s when my social life really picked up so just know this phase is temporary and you CAN go back out there and enjoy night life again. For my baby that was at 18m

@Kellie Thank you for the reassurance! Sometimes I feel so much guilt when I go do something for me or do anything without my daughter.

@Hokulani yeah no don’t babe. I look forward to my breaks, my nights off, my time w my gfs. I come back so much more refreshed so happier Hubby can see that also so he encourages my breaks. As a sahm that spends like 14 waking hrs w my boy every single day, that Friday night I go out is much needed. I feel better knowing he’s asleep and I’m not missing out on “parenting” if that makes sense. But the times I go out during the day on the weekends w my friends I know baby’s in good hands, plus good bonding time w Daddy, I tell myself that so I feel less guilt. Like it’s good for them to spend time w Daddy alone too 🙂

Feel this so much!! I had my first when I was 21 and at that time all my friends where just the same enjoying their 20’s and having fun I definitely lost friends as well and at the time I missed it so much but as time passed I slowly got used to it. I just had my 2nd last year and now I’m 26 soon to be 27. It’s still hard but I learned that I have to make time for me and enjoy myself in other ways. Find mom friend and do family friendly activities as well as solo activities. Also I think about the good part when I’m in my 40’s my kids will be more independent and I can also enjoy that phase of my life and many ppl will be just now starting to have kids. It’s a natural feeling/ process but it is hard

I had my first baby in my early 20s and she was a total surprise 🙃 I had to grieve my old life- like actually go through the grieving steps because life isn’t and won’t ever be the same. I felt like there was this responsibility that I have for the rest of my life that I hadn’t ever had before and it was really hard. It’s normal to process this, hugs💕

I had my first baby in my early 20s and she was a total surprise 🙃 I had to grieve my old life- like actually go through the grieving steps because life isn’t and won’t ever be the same. I felt like there was this responsibility that I have for the rest of my life that I hadn’t ever had before and it was really hard. It’s normal to process this, hugs💕