Wedding invitation advice needed

I have started planning my wedding and a friend I met on this app has assumed she’s invited to my wedding and even said ‘don’t get married / pick your wedding date on ‘X’ day because I’m maid of honour at ‘X’ wedding’ (I haven’t picked a venue or date yet) and also offered to help with invitations which is really nice but I was only invited to her wedding evening last year and earlier from this she hosted a mixer which was super awkward - her fiancé blanked my fiancé and just spoke to his friends and then my friend then proceeded to hand out her wedding invitations in front of me and my fiancé and said ‘oh your evening invite will follow soon’ in front of everyone. She never gave me an actual invitation - just told me to go into a link and confirm if I was going. I didn’t go in the end but still got her a gift. She’s nice and fun to hang out with with our children and chat in general but I don’t always feel like she truly values my friendship compared to her other friends and I feel awkward inviting her because my fiancé doesn’t like her that much after the mixer, I was only invited to the evening of hers (we aren’t having evening guests) and she has 3 kids that are allowed to do what they like and tantrum all the time and I don’t really want that at my wedding day because I know they will be allowed to do as they please with no boundaries most likely at my wedding and don’t want it ruining my ceremony and I feel awkward because I’m inviting other closer friends kids. I don’t really know what to do. Thanks.

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nope nope nope. i agree it’s conflicting because it’s your friend but i’d just tell her you’re not changing the date. this is your wedding, yours alone. what happens on that day you’ll have those memories the rest of your life. if there’s a chance your friend isn’t going to respect every aspect of it then again your wedding and your choice. but i think you know what to do 😕

@Alysha Mattox Thanks for your input. Yes that’s how I feel - sorry I have just edited the first bit as I probably didn’t make sense. I haven’t locked in a venue / date yet but she told me not to select a certain date as she’s MOH on ‘X’ date. I just feel so awkward about the situation as we chat a lot and see each other often. Unsure how to politely not invite her or invite her to keep the friendship but tell her that her kids aren’t invited (considering I’m inviting other peoples children). I don’t want her kids lack of boundaries ruining my wedding day. She’s also one of those people that thinks her kids are perfect - even when they tantrum and other kids aren’t as perfect as hers. My fiancé doesn’t really like her and doesn’t like her now husband but would probably get over it if I just invited her and her husband but I also don’t want to make my fiancé frustrated on our wedding day by having them there. She isn’t aware my fiancé doesn’t like her much (I prefer to avoid drama). 😅

Just send her an evening invite like she did to you. She can't expect to come all day to yours if she didn't invite you to hers all day.

@Rachel yeah it did run through my mind - we don’t have any other evening guests (we like to make everyone invited feel special so it’s all or nothing for us). But given the scenario - do you think it would still be fine to do that / only invite her as an evening guest? 😅

Yeah, definitely. She won't know that everyone else who is there in the evening came all day, will she 😉

@Rachel thanks - yeah you’re right. She probably wouldn’t find out unless she asked everyone there which would be so weird 🤣

yeah @Rachel has a nice point she wouldn’t know and if you don’t mind her and her kids in the evening then i think it’s a perfect plan lol

and shoot she might not even bring her kids because it’ll get so late lol

Our wedding is mainly all family, we have a strict guest count and family comes first. Just say something like that if she brings it up? Tell her if anyone backs out we will start inviting outside of the family but for now we are keeping it to family and a strict number

Go with evening only invite or small wedding lie, you're only inviting family, can't afford everyone there etc.

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