Feeling overwhelmed and not myself

You’re not alone. It’s hard enough trying to figure out why they’re crying- add in sleep deprivation and the touch overstimulation. I get it! It’s okay to cry, mama. Life sucks sometimes and we can be so hard on ourselves! It’s okay to walk away when you feel overwhelmed. And it’s okay if baby cries for a bit while we use the bathroom or step away to reset. It doesn’t make you a bad mom. Remember, take care of you so you can take care of others. And those voices inside your head? They’re just renting space- you’re the landlord. Find another tenant. Fill your mind with anything and everything better. I realized a couple weeks ago I hadn’t listened to music since I had my baby- that’s over 2 months! I guess I enjoyed the sound of silence. However, the sound of music again takes up more space and I’m grateful for the peace it’s given me. Also, I’ve been told headphones are a game changer! How’s work from home going?

Oof. I'm sorry. It's a hard transition for you and baby. Would baby wearing allow you to hold them and get work done? Can you schedule extra time to hold baby and cuddle since you are at home? Not knowing your work flexibility, I don't know if that's an option. At night, do you use a white noise machine or anything? Blackout curtains, white nose etc might help you get a little more sleep. There is a 4 month sleep regression and it's one of the worst. Your little may be in that. If that's the case, know that it doesn't last. Can your partner take some of the night wakeups or the bedtime feed so you can get a chunk of sleep in? Either a solid chunk at the beginning or end of the night may help.

@Jennifer thank you for this. I think in the moment it is so hard for me to see and think clearly. I’ve tried adding a mediation podcast in the mornings to help reset my mind. It’s my second day back and it’s going as good as I could have hoped for. Work isn’t super demanding at the moment.

@Miriam yes we are approaching his 4 month mark and I noticing the sleep regression. My husband and I are now sleeping in the same bed since we are both back at work and he is there to help, it’s more of my ears picking up all noises that I am up even when he is with the baby. But yes, I use a white noise machine to help. I guess we are just working past this stage of sleep at the moment. It’s tough but I try and stay positive but there are those moments of internal struggle exploding and my husband just doesn’t understand the extent of it.

We’re in this together! Sometimes it takes an outside view to see that there’s a light… it might not always be guiding us out but it can give us a different perspective at least. There’s sometimes my girl is crying and crying and crying and all I want to do is cry with her. (Sometimes I do!) I feel helpless. But sometimes my mind does me a solid and floods me with sweet thoughts of love and patience. “No one else can give her the peace and comfort you do. You are her safe place. This won’t last forever.” Take one hour at a time. I don’t know what your WFH job is like but remember- there are others and there may be ways you can change it up to be easier to do both. Being a SAHM is a full time job alone- kudos to you for taking on two at the same time!

Give yourself grace. No one is at their best with such lack of sleep. Remember to take care of you. Small things help too! Get the fun coffeee you deserve, eat your dessert when you want to, turn on your fav show if you have time, paint your nails. Not that you have time for these things but when you do, the point is to take care of you!! Being a mom is hard work and harder when you don’t get sleep and aren’t able to treat yourself. And ask for help if you can get it! Hey a family member to help watch her one day while you get in a nap!