Bf wants to circumcise, I do not. What do?

Our son is 5 weeks old. He is not circ yet and I feel strongly that I don’t want him to go through that procedure. My bf has been adamant since we found out the gender that he absolutely MUST have it done. The thing is, he’s not taking any initiative to schedule the thing or look into how it can be done. His reasoning is “he doesn’t want them to be different,” since he is circumcised, and “it’s for his religion,” which technically makes sense as it’s a part of BOTH of our religions, but moreso mine as I’m the Jewish one. But, upon being asked what’s the religious meaning, he didn’t have it. I was okay with it being done religiously but none of the Jewish doctors I found in the area will do it unless he’s being raised Jewish, and he’s not. It’s already been 5 weeks… and I’ve stopped looking into it because of all of the hurdles and the fact that we’d have to pay out of pocket for it. I’m not sure how my partner will handle it as time goes on. What do?

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If he really wants it done tell him to schedule it and get it done because obviously it looks like you’ve tried and your not even the main parent who wants it done so if time goes by you don’t want him to blame you for it not being done . And since your okay with it you can tell him to schedule it you know and tell him we have to raise him Jewish for them to do it

Tbh religion or not. Circumcision to boys is horrific. There's no reason it needs to be done unless there's some sort of serious medical issue. Putting a baby boy through that unsafe traumatic experience is ya know I don't even have words for it. As his mother in my opinion you have every right to stand your ground with this and not get it done. my husband and I agreed not to get it done to our boy. And my husband is circumcised. The moral ethics of it is just wrong. I hope it all works out!

My son was circumcised at 8mo. There was only one doctor in the ENTIRE state that could do it & she had a pretty hefty waitlist. The way I looked at it was “dad has the same body part & I don’t, so I’m gonna ask him & see what he thinks is best”

We circumcised our boy the day after he was born. We looked into research on it before we made our decision. My husband came across a whole bunch of males maybe on reddit that hadn't been circumcised that wish they had been at birth. They didn't like being different and whatever else. So we decided to circumcise. After the procedure they brought him back in and he was sound asleep. The lady that did it said 'I never lie about how the baby does. If he cried I tell the parents they cried but settled down. It's my job doing these procedures to be honest about how the patient does and handled the procedure. But your son slept through the whole thing,'

Ours were all done in the first 24 hr and recovery was easy, less than 7 days. But it's a very personal decision. I have circumcised boys but think piercings the ears of an infant is narcissistic and barbaric. If you both don't want it, don't do it?

@Tiffany the hospital did not offer it. It probably would have been done if they did. I’ve been on the fence about it because he wants it but if it was fully my decision it’s a No

Your OB/GYN doesn’t offer it? Mine does and kept offering to do it but I chose not to have it done. His father is not circumcised and he didn’t think it was necessary and neither do I.

@LeKenya that’s weird that your OBGYN offers it. His ped said it needs to be a pediatric urologist. My insurance doesn’t cover it

If you don’t want it to be done then don’t. It’s not necessary to do and he will get over it

I wouldn't do anything to my child for a boyfriend that I didnt want done. Period. If you cant commit to marriage, you cant commit to a permanent alteration to my kid that cant be undone once done.

Let it go. If he wants it done he can figure out how to get it done.

My fiance let me decide whether or not our boys were circumcised and I chose not too. After our first he did say that he wished I would’ve but that I was true in saying that if when they are older and want it done we would pay for it then. I think not circumcising is becoming more and more common.

My plan was to circumcise but when he was born he had to go to the nicu and by the time he was out they said they don’t do it after 10 days so i couldn’t do it but now im glad we didn’t