Need help to leave my marriage
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Because he’s already showing signs of being vindictive and emotionally unstable, it’s important that you don’t tell him you’re leaving until you’re somewhere safe. I know that’s easier said than done, but your safety and your son’s safety come first. Quietly start gathering things like important documents, clothes, essentials for your baby, and keep them somewhere hidden or with someone you trust. Don’t wait for a perfect moment—just make sure you and your baby have what you need when it’s time to go. There are also resources out there that can help you create a safety plan and support you through this. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is completely confidential, and you can call, text, or chat online whenever it’s safe. They’ll walk you through your options and help you plan, no pressure. You’re also not wrong for worrying about your child witnessing this. Even if he’s young, children pick up on everything.
If you’re afraid of what leaving might look like legally, especially with custody, there are people who can help with that too—legal aid, DV advocates, and family court specialists who are used to dealing with situations like this. You’re not stuck, even if it feels like it right now. I’m really glad you spoke up. You’re clearly an amazing mom who just wants peace and safety for herself and her child. You deserve both. Please don’t feel embarrassed or ashamed. So many of us have been there—and you’re not crazy, dramatic, or selfish. You’re waking up to something that’s been hurting you for too long, and you’re allowed to leave. Sending you strength, love, and whatever peace I can through this message. You’re not alone in this. If you ever want to talk more, vent, or just have someone remind you that you’re doing the right thing ❤️
@Kaylin thank you so so much. Your words are so deeply appreciated. It’s so powerful to be validated in this way and I usually feel pretty scared and weak and little bit this helps remind me that I am brave too and trying very hard to be strong. So thank you so very much. This is exactly what I needed to hear and be reminded of as he just made me nervous again. I also want to take a moment to appreciate your strength and kindness as well as knowledge and support. I hope you have never had to be in this spot because no one should ever have to be, but feels like you get it on a deeper level and I’m working to make sure I take your words in as much as possible. 💕
Hey mama, first I just want to say how incredibly brave you are for opening up about this. I know it probably took everything in you to even write that post, and I just want you to know that I believe you—and you’re not alone. What you described is emotional abuse, and it’s real. You’re not imagining it, and you’re not overreacting. Everything you’re feeling—confused, scared, unsure—is completely valid. It’s common for it to take years to fully realize the pattern, especially when the person flips between being cruel and “loving.” That doesn’t make you weak. That makes you human. And the fact that you’re now starting to stand up for yourself and think about leaving tells me how strong you really are.