Everything seems to be fall apart

My marriage has never been in a worse place. I am so unhappy. I cannot count on my husband as he voluntarily works after hours and his days off. (He is a salaried employee, so it’s not about extra money) But he is lazy at home, swears he’ll get to stuff but never does. Forgets everything. But he comes down so hard on our kids if they are messy or forget anything. He is defensive whenever I bring it up, and recently started insulting me if I ask when he’s going to do or finish stuff. He acts as if his time is more valuable than mine or the kids. Now my kids are picking up his ways and I am so sad, mad and confused. I don’t know what to do. I don’t work, mainly bc I can’t count on my husband to be here so I can get to work on time. We have no money saved, we’re living paycheck to paycheck and I’m trying to get Xmas together but have no funds…..or spirit if I’m being honest. I never get a day off. Ever. And I signed up for that I get it…but how do I not feel resentful when I ask my husband for help and get told he’s sleeping in Bc it’s his day off?