Husband falling asleep w/baby
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also, i hate to say this, but maybe share w him statistics showing how unsafe it is. i know for my husband, it took him know how unsafe/dangerous it actually is for him to fall asleep w her on the recliner to take me serious so i had to start telling him statistics and even sent him a post from a IG Account that spreads awareness about it. i tell him WAKE ME UP. idc how tired i am or what i’m doing, just get me and i will do the same if im too tired.
Dude I had the same issue with my boyfriend and he wasn't even working or doing anything all day but was apparently so tired from being on his phone all day while I took care of the baby. Idk how to help u bc I ended up dumping the guy, I feel ur frustration tho
It was SO important to me that my husband understood how dangerous cosleeping is, I wanted to get the point across so bad I specifically sought out videos and posts of mothers & fathers talking about how they lost their baby to cosleeping. It is sad, but it has happened, and I know these parents make these videos to also help get the point across, so maybe started loading him up on those? The stories are always so heartbreaking to hear but it was so important to me my husband understood I would ring his neck if I ever caught him asleep with my son in his hands 😅 and I gotta say, it worked! There’s one woman on tiktok I can’t remember her name but sadly her baby passed away due to positional asphyxiation because her husband was holding their baby in a recliner and fell asleep, my husband is a big recliner guy and I think that was the one story where he was really like “wow ok so I shouldn’t do that”
I'm gonna be going against the grain, but I would give him grace. I've done the same unfortunately. This girl let's off some serious sleepy vibes, especially while on the boob, but also even when just giving a bottle. Me and husband have both discussed how it effects both of us. But he does need to make more of an effort/ tell you when he can't stay awake. But I also agree with someone else, if he's often that tired late in the day maybe he should give you your break away from baby at another time
During the first few weeks of extreme sleep deprivation I would get sleepy while night feeding and I realized that it's more important I stay awake than she is exposed to light at night so I decided I would turn the lights on if I felt tired
Oh babe I wish I could give u some advice I do it all alone even though I’m married
Um…just safely remove the baby from his arms….he’s tired…you’re tired…put baby in a safe sleeping place and get some sleep.
@Thaya I woke him up and he put her down in bassinet eventually. I’m just so scared it’ll happen again (fall asleep on recliner) and something bad happens. But thank you
@Kristina yes I agree. I was kind and gracious the first time, and the second time. Just felt like I needed to put my foot down this time cos this is the third time, plus I felt like baby was in such an unsafe position this time! Just put a lot of fear in me. 😣 my “me time” is bed time so he feeds the bottle. Now I feel like I need to also put her down so we can avoid this 😩
@Abbie safe cosleeping is safe. What he is doing is not cosleeping. It's falling asleep. I cosleep off and on with my baby and she's very healthy and never, ever, ever in that type of position. She is either chest sleeping or on her back following the safe sleep 7. Situations like these are preventable and are not a good representation of what cosleeping/bed sharing looks like.
I co sleep with my baby and make sure we are in a safe position. You could try to ask him to make sure he is in a comfortable, safe spot on the couch, etc. you could encourage him try a bottle and pacifier and keep switching until the baby is asleep and then ask him to put the baby down in a crib or whatever you use. I know that it is potentially harmful to co sleep but eaches own. It works for us
do you wake him up every time or just take her? is it possible that he try to get her to sleep elsewhere (not the recliner)? like maybe feed and rock her standing up or in a bed so at least it’s a little more safe. honestly, if he can’t get her to sleep w out falling asleep, i would say that he should take a different duty and you put her to sleep. maybe he does the night routine (bath, diaper change, book or whatevs your routine is) but you actually get her to sleep. i’m sure this is super frustrating bc you’re already breastfeeding all day, but if he keeps falling asleep, it might just have to be what it is. maybe he can take her more during the day/evening so you get your break then and you put her to sleep instead.