Birth certificate/surname regrets

Anyone regret putting their child’s dad on the birth certificate/giving their child(ren) his last name? I’m literally only putting my bd on the certificate to 1. Keep the peace 2. God forbid something were to happen to me, I wouldn’t want my child to be classed as an orphan and 3. Maybe he will actually step up and do more once it feels official (lol I won’t hold my breath) However I’m scared I’m going to regret giving him this opportunity, all he’s done is be a let down recently. He was there for the first week after LO was born but since we fell out he’s disappeared. Ugh, I hate that I’m even giving him this opportunity but like I said I have valid reasons
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My cousin regrets doing it and she sadly lost custody of her daughter for a year because of bd's manipulations

Don't give that man's baby last name. His name being on it will not change anything. I'm not even putting my bd last name on my daughter's. If he wants to claim her after birth he can do an dna test to get put on the birth certificate.

If he wanted to be on it, he could petition to be added. It won't make him do any more or less. I left mine off, and I don't regret that.. it's more of a worry to me honestly to have someone who i don't feel has the capability to raise or care for this baby to have like legal rights to them. That's what scared me away from putting mine on there. Like legal rights should be earned in some situations, in my opinion.. i know not everyone feels that way, but I do

Oh gosh I really don’t know what to do ladies 😫 I have a week left

Can’t he can be on certificate without kid having his surname? Not sure where you are based but in UK you give the surname it’s not automatically the father’s

If you aren't 💯 in your decision to do it I would say dont. (You can't undo it once it's done. But you can re do it and add him in the future) Just sayin. It's a important choice. Think long and hard. Also tho if you sleep on it maybe you'll just wake up and know the answer. Trust your instincts

@Vicky hey, I’m in the UK yeah. I have considered that and also considered double barrelling it but then I think about if I get married one day then my children will have my maiden name and I no longer will. Whereas their dad will always have the same surname

@ren that’s very true about me not being able to undo it but being able to redo it, thanks girl I’m gonna sleep on it (all week lol) for sure 💞

For the longest time I had the same feelings bout putting dad on birth certificate and I finally decided last week he will not be on the birth certificate or even there. It’s been two months and all the threats still have yet to appear. If I were you DONT let him! That’s just more control that he will have over not just you but your baby also!

I’m due in December and engaged but not married. We agreed to double barrel baby name and when we marry we will also double barrel so we all have the same. Tbf it’s because I like my surname and neither me or my partner like his very much so this was better decision for us. Would you consider double barrelling when you marry to keep part of your maiden name. Just thinking for travelling etc would be good to have even part of same last name as kids and also if you give them BD name from outset they won’t ever match your name which can make passports travelling etc more tricky

When we were just breaking up, bd demanded I put his name as BG's last name. But as things got worse before she was born, I left his name off the birth certificate completely

I regret giving my son his fathers last name if we end up having more kids I’m telling him I want them to have my last name I just struggle pronouncing his and I look dumb at doctor’s appointments it’s embarrassing

I’m 5 months postpartum and this the most happy and peacefull Ive ever been, we broke up 2-3 months before my due date and all he did in my pregnancy make me feel miserable always having excuses for everything I was completly exausted…. I dont regret at ALL not putting him in the birth certifícate, real men will step up by their own I told him if you wants your rights you can go and get them thats your choice since you can choose your freedom while I have to be a mother and provide for our child. Im not gonna go chase you for child support, or travel signatures, Im tired of chasing you want to be a father and be there FOR REAL we can co parent with those conditions if not do not text me, do not come to my house and disturb my peace Im happy now

and be carefull if you decide to put him anyways I dont care if he is your bestfriend ASK FOR CHILD SUPPORT As the caregiver we have to be responsible with our money always and the other parent “supposedly" too, for your own peace do it.

Yes I regret it a little 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️ I want to get her passport rn n can’t. But Atleast I can file for child support 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

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You already feel like you are going to regret it. That feeling should be your answer. My daughter's father made me feel miserable throughout my pregnancy, and I thought he would step up once my daughter was born, but he was even worse after she was born. She's nearly 8 months now, and the last time he saw her was in February. I wouldn't do it if I were you. His last name shouldn't be the only reason he should step up as a father. The fact that the child is his blood should be more than enough for anyone to want to step up for their child.

i regret it. i hyphenated it but i shouldn’t have put his name. he does nothing at all

I struggled with this too. Especially since I am widowed and still have my married name. But like I've seen in these comments u can always change it later or he can put in the effort to get it added. I ended up giving my daughter my maiden name and the certificate lists my name before marriage and after so on paper we had that same last name. I still want to change my name back but if I get married again it's always on her certificate. Plus if u cant count on him it might be difficult to help your child later. I was worried about him either not filling out paper work or fighting with me on school stuff or healthcare which he would have more of a right to do so even when I live across town and she lives with me.

My children's father is on their birth certificates but they have my surname because we are not married and now he has agreed it's easier for him to just take our surname when we marry rather than change all 3 of our surnames

My daughter has my last name and no dad on her birth certificate her donor dipped out and my husband stepped into the picture before she was born but didn’t want to sign the birth certificate bc the baby daddy was starting drama and my husband got told he could go to jail don’t know if it’s true but didn’t risk it anyways I don’t regret it bc my daughter doesn’t have to know her donor nor will she ever her dad is her dad and that’s it but anyways even if you put him on the birth certificate he doesn’t have rights that’s just saying he is claiming the baby as his and will make it hard for him to deny it in Court

I put my BD name on my son’s birth certificate almost 2 years ago, he also has his last name. I regret both daily

@Naii literally my thought process too, at least the law will make him help out financially lol, that being said, child support in England can be so bad at times

@Celeste oh I definitely will ask for child support because once again he’s happy to give me money when we’re on good terms but when we’re not… nothing. He hasn’t paid a penny since baby has actually been born smh

@Theresa you have a good partner there!

I for one regret it so bad. I did it for the same reasons and now I just wanna slap myself caz y didn't I listen. POS created a whole scene in the delivery room because I won't let him see my personal info like my social security number and some other stuff they ask, then went outside to get his ass of a mother who had the nerve to come and say he has a right to see it just in case caz he would like to have proof that his child. They know I'm respectful, but I sure told her I'm not your son I don't sleep around and looked at her daughter too caz wtf they in my room 5 hours after I gave birth to my baby with that bullshit. So he told the my nurse who apparently was her best friend that he doesn't want to put his name on the birth certificate caz he he's not sure he's d father. I said he has nine months n it's not the first he mention it and I said the moment he ever ask me for one we are done caz he knows I'm not that type. So he had the nurse and his mom both disrespected me. Anyways.

They said they gonna hold off on signing it until they get a DNA test and I said fine by me but I ain't requesting ntn on my insurance or pay for ntn wait till I leave this place and also don't even bother think imma agree to putting u on after. Tell me why when I was asleep he went through my chart, then through the papers and then decided to sign the birth certificate? This asshole put me through a lot during and after my pregnancy and still tryna do more. I'm guessing he got what he wanted. His mother tried to control every decision like she gave birth to my child. She babies her grown ass son, who seem more interested in tormenting me than taking care of his son. I regret having his name on the certificate, caz now I need his signature to get a passport. He told me I'm at fault for him not helping financially caz I moved away to give my son a better life. Now telling me to grow up in texts caz I stop taking his calls n text. Am I wrong , idk but idc, I'm tired.

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