Is my life over?

Hey girlies, quick question/rant My daughter is about to be 2 in November. I’m a stay at home mom and haven’t been back to work since I gave birth. My boyfriend takes care of all the bills/everything we need and we’re not struggling so I feel as though I got comfortable. With my girl finally about to be 2, I feel it’s time I start to ease back into doing things for me but I honestly feel like I completely lost myself and don’t even know who I am anymore. I’m an introvert, I don’t have any friends so I can slowly get back to hanging out or “running errand with the girls” because there aren’t any. I just feel like I need to better myself, my life and I don’t know how or where to start. I have a great family/support village so I do know that if there’s something that I want to do I have support.. idk I just need help. Any advice?
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I honestly struggle with the exact same thing. Very introverted, no friends to casually hang out with, and I never really had a career before becoming a mother. I have personally started pretty small in rediscovering myself. It started with cross stitch kits I bought at the dollar store, getting back into reading books, back into my painting, arts and crafts, gardening, making my own family cookbook of recipes I find on the internet to print out. It’s not much but a little here and there when I can has helped me feel more accomplished and productive. You could try taking classes at your local library to see what interests you again and gets you out of the house. Perhaps volunteering. Maybe you have a goal or vision of what your family/work life will look like then work backwards? I like to think of it as a new beginning or untapped potential to really try a little bit of as much as you can and find what you like.

@Emily It doesn’t get any better when family is telling you that you need to go do something with yourself also. Such a weird and tiring space to be in

I would go to therapy to solve all that. You need to find the answers for yourself, not to copycat what worked for others.

You can have a life and thrive regardless of the friends you have or number of friends you have. Me personally? I’d start small. Maybe take ten minutes to yourself each night…preferably off the phone. So journal, tea, doodling reading idk whatever you like even a bath. Plenty of people in the world go out alone, etc. so even if you need to or want to re build friendship you don’t need to wait until that happens to get out of the house. Make a list of some things you’d like to do in the free time you have when your child is being watched? Is it a part time job, a hike or walk, try a new coffee shop, etc. pick one thing to do each time. You can slowly discover yourself through self exploration. I’m extremely introverted and still find a way to go do things and it’s alone a lot of the times. I do what I can handle and then leave and am typically satisfied that I tried

Ideas: Try an in person mom's group or a preschool co-op a few hours per week to meet a few consistent people who are in a similar place in life. Shop for new clothes. See a movie by yourself. Take a personality test. Make soup. Browse in a bookstore. Try Masterclass, Duolingo, or Blogilates, whatever jumps out to you. Clean out your garage/basement/storage area and throw old stuff away. It will help you be more organized, and you'll find lots of other projects when you do this. Dress up nice and actively date your husband again. See new places and try new experiences (you can even take your kid!) It will inspire you to see familiar things with new eyes. Advice: You don't have to do anything. You are enough right now. If you aren't craving time for yourself, don't worry about other people telling you what you should be doing. Being a task on your own to do list defeats the point.

I'm the same an introvert with very few friends. Loves staying home housework and hobbies. My long term goal is to move house and qualify as a legal secretary

Omg is this me? I feel all these exact same things you’ve described. I’m also an introvert and have no friends either, I don’t even have family around (I’m from another country) and my girl will be 2 in September, so my partner is supporting me into going to university, I’m really lost, I lost my social skills, confidence and self-steem, but I think starting my studies will help me discover myself again

Did you just read me?? Also an introvert..I work from home only a few hours during the week. My daughter is not in daycare & we get out when we can/play dates. I also do Amazon flex. My mom is extremely helpful..I’m limited on friends hanging out tho..

I am very fortunate to be part of an ongoing art mentorship program that keeps me even when kids stuff plows through freelance or product plans. Recently they ran us through a networking for introverts subcourse, and really it was how to be a mench. The content was based on these two books Sorry I am late I didn't want to come https://share.libbyapp.com/title/4671110 How to be yourself https://share.libbyapp.com/title/3442908 In the class I had to talk to strangers, deal with rejection, practice being intrested, plan collaborative events. I didn't have the energy to implement everything but I feel so solid for when fall rolls in, I think I will enjoy being around other parents at dropoff/pickup. I am definitely still an introvert, and I have to pace myself, but I feel this is another thing to share with my kids. My oldest makes friends easily but has some anxiety.

@Mariya never said I was copying from others.. where did you read that at?

That's good. It's ok to loose yourself. Now you can invent what you want to be 💪 one step at a time mama.

@Autumn please look at the video above

@Eva please look at the video above

@Emily please look at the video above

@Porshia please look at the video above

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I feel the same way I even enrolled in school to make extra including what I got but still don’t know what career I want to go into

@Aurélie thank you, I needed to hear this

You can be an introvert and still thrive mama. I'm a total home body with a few close friends and I make time to see the family I enjoy spending time with. Without the kids.

I don’t say you copy, I say that even the best of the best of solutions for me or for someone else for you will be something mediocre. The best solution for you is only what you can find

Feeling this too 💜

This the beginning of a new life for yourself and you can do whatever you want! (And that’s scary)

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