Agree with Anais. In my house I parent how I would if she was my own in terms of care, duties, discipline and expectations. Husband seems to mind sometimes and I find myself pulling him aside and asking him not to undermine my authority in front of the kid (and our future kid on the way). The way I see it my house my rules.
Yes and honestly you have to parent your own child how you want to or you will just grow to feel trapped and resentful.
Defo parent your child the way you want to. I parent my SD the way I want to parent my little one. She has more respect for her dad and me than at her mums or nans. I’ve set boundaries and rules which is different to when she’s at her mums/nans as she doesn’t have any set there (or if she does, doesn’t listen.) It’s weird to parent a step child anyway, soooo strange. But don’t let that stop you parenting your own child the way you want to x
You just make subtle changes or talk to your husband about it all. I definitely parent different with my 1 year old than how my SK was brought up. Think about it this way, some step parents don’t talk to their step kids and just nacho. You can never control what happens at their mums but can always control what happens at yours. Your child is at the perfect age to be making these changes now.