Relationship struggling
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Yes massively! It’s been a bit of a journey & still is! I’m surprised we’re still together to be honest x
Yes us. We hardly see each other 5yr old 15m old and we just tag team with kids housework work school etc and no sleep! I'm waiting for it to get easier.
It’s a huge struggle. I’m hoping we can start doing couples counseling but don’t know if we have time or budget. Who has the time?! I often remind us the “we’re on the same team” when we butt heads. I find it hard for my husband to understand how much it takes to be a mom - and for me a working mom.
We have started this week couples therapy. https://www.regain.us/get-started/ we are useing is one of the most convenient ways.
I want to leave and would have done a long time ago but I’m in a real pickle with the joint mortgage situation as he’s refusing to separate or sell the house. @Valentina how much are the therapy sessions?
We really struggled up until last month. I was holding onto a lot of resentment. They just don’t get how hard it is. It’s a massive strain on your relationship. I hope you can make it work, if u want to. A date night helped me remember why I liked him x
Sending you a big hug. This parenting shit isn’t easy and I’d be lying if I said I’d never thought of how lovely it would be to separate and have a break when my lb would go and see his dad etc. it’s so hard to sometimes see them as anything else but a room mate and I hope things get easier or clearer for you x
Love + hugs! They always say not to mention breaking up in the first year as everything is chaos (unless they're is a real good reason!) remember who they were before your baby and you can still talk to them even if you feel you can't!! Xxx
Resentment is a killer and it's so hard to move on from, different roles and perspectives. Have to remind my self daily that my partner is trying lol xx
@Sophie is 60£ x week! I really recommended!
Thank you so much everyone. It’s nice to know I’m not alone !! X
Yes they just don’t get how hard it is and I miss the fun /date nights we had pre baby. Resentment is a huge part- I always have to ask if I can go out but he always tells me he is going out. Does my head in!!
Yes ever since baby was born our relationship has changed massively. I don't have much of a sex drive anymore and my husband isn't understanding this. I will admit it has got a bit better in the last week or so as we are trying to be intimate more for baby number 2 and just trying to not hit heads anymore xx sending lots of love
Yep, we’ve been rocky for a while but it’s getting to the point where we either need to end it or make massive changes. He’s actually going to stay at his mums for a few days tonight x
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Yes, I don't think he realised that he can't just do as he wishes when he wishes anymore. He also is baffled by my mum brain and forgetfulness as I've almost become the opposite person to who I was (which was organised and on top of everything all the time) and I've also changed by not wanting to do absolutely everything and wanting him to step up with housework, too. It hit both of us hard, and I don't think he has accustomed to actually needing to help and organise and plan things. He is trying though, and I am glad we are still together because it's slowly improving for both of us, but it's new and we are vastly different to who we were pre baby 👶
@Molly we trialled this for a bit. Hope it goes okay for you xx
My partner has stepped up a bit, after me having the biggest row with him about helping out around the house and being a bit more proactive. However, I feel like why does everything have to get to the point of a big row for him to change. I’d asked him and explained how tired I was over and over again and it fell on deaf ears. I feel like I have to spoon feed him on things that should come naturally. Finding myself less and less attracted to him because it’s like having an extra child in the house so then the intimacy disappears and he then complains about that! Just feel so fed up x
How’s everyone doing x
Yep, it's hard. Some days are better than others and he is starting to slowly share the load for the baby. Here if you ever want to talk x
More than once I've looked at what's available to rent locally a number of times, checked the benefits calculator, planned it all out in my head etc. I've just never yet plucked up the courage to do anything. He seems oblivious to things and whenever I say how unhappy I am I simply get a blank look. I really don't know what's best to do. Sorry to be no help but you're not alone.