Perineal massage
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I listened to the perineum series on the evidence based birth podcast when I had heard about perineal massage and it kind of sounded like there is no real evidence behind it being effective. If you want to continue, go for your life, but I would listen to those episodes first before continuing to make yourself uncomfortable.
I done perineal massages before both my babies and I didn’t tear at all so I think it works. My husband done mine though (it was not sexy 😂) as I couldn’t reach
My husband did it for me with coconut oil. Nothing special, just slight pressure/massaging. Sometimes I could only handle a few mins at a time. Did it somewhat consistently towards the end of pregnancy. I didn’t tear down/to the back, I had a 2 weird small tears on the sides, but they healed fast and weren’t bad. So I think it helped. I tore a little still cuz she came out fast and I may have pushed too hard, but they said to push so I did 😂
@Chloé Collier my husband did mine too. Definitely not sexy 😂 We didn't do it more than a handful of times, and I had a 1st degree tear that healed pretty quick (I think that means 1 stitch?)
I have heard if you try some heat first it helps. I’m still having sex without pain though so I don’t have the experience with the pain part of it sorry. My pelvic floor therapist swears by Kegel exercises too and stresses to not give birth on your back if at all possible to prevent it.