Do you think it’s unethical to have more kids if you can’t afford it?
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Just a money issue no it's not unethical. I personally think it's unethical to tell poor people not to have kids. But the hoarding or dangerous situation yes that's pretty bad. Poor doesn't mean unsafe or bad and rich doesn't mean it's safe
I wouldn't say unethical but I don't think it's smart to purposely have more kids if you're already struggling. One of my old friends from high school had to move back in with his parents because they didn't have enough money and was regularly being given money by his in laws to help their financial situation and they purposely had a second child while they legitimately can't afford the roof over their heads and they are only allowed to stay at the parents house up until this year is over. I imagine they are banking on the parents letting them stay longer because they are pregnant again. I think having more kids in that situation is unethical because you're banking on others' support. And what happens when they finally decide they don't want to help you anymore
When you want to have kids, and youre lower income you learn to stretch your budget, make the most of the space you do have, and provide for your kids. You make it happen because you have kids to provide for. That all being said, they shouldn’t be bringing another child into a hoarding situation. Sounds like they need to get that under control before having a second child.
Unethical? No i wouldn't use that word. Irresponsible For Sure but I wouldn't say Unethical
@Kylie this is very similar to what is happening in the example I gave. And to be clear, I don’t think it’s okay to tell the lower class to just not have kids but you need to be able to provide for those kids. My husband and I live with family as well because my pregnancy was unplanned and staying home with my daughter really hurt our finances. BUT we are making 100% sure we do not get pregnant again because that is not fair to my daughter or my in laws for housing us
A hoarding situation can be extremely dangerous for an adult, let alone a child. For example if there’s a fire, or if there’s dangerous items in the hoard that can hurt a child. Or even just the fact that’s kids deserve to have a clean environment to grow up in. CPS can even be called at times for it if it’s severe. They need to get out of the hoarding situation or that’s not a proper environment to bring another child into. Period. And I am saying this as a lower middle class mom myself.
@Lucy Sundin I do acknowledge that hoarding is not equivalent to lower class. The hoard is not tooooo severe yet. I’ve gone to help reorganize it many times. The thing that gets me is just last month they had a scare that the person they are living with was moving out of state suddenly and they were facing HOMELESSNESS. Thankfully that fell through but I just cannot fathom them turning around after something like that happens and having another child. And again I’m not shitting on their financial situation. I’m in a very similar financial situation. I’m more being critical of their decision to go have another kid. And I know I’m being judgey as hell but like 💀 cmon
Absolutely it doesn’t have to be. I have a 3 bedroom house for my family of 5 and we don’t have a huge space but we make sure they have a clean environment still and take care of the home we do own still. And you’re just telling them the truth. I don’t think you’re being judgy.
I think usually money shouldn’t be a reason to not have kids because as someone said above you can find ways and get through it. We did, when it was REALLY bad. Now we’re good. however, you did mention unsafe living conditions which does of course change things. I think the question needs to be worded differently because you asked solely about money but your description involves other factors. In the scenario you gave then yes it is unethical, but the money issue alone then no, and it would be only their business xx
I think having kids when you cant give them a safe secure home and food to eat isn't fair Other than that the rest is all subjective on what you want to buy in this consumer driven world we live in
I personally think, it's all about proper planning
Here’s the way I think of it. Have as many kids as you can. You’ll never regret kids unless you genuinely didn’t want them to start. But if you want kids you figure out a way. Now this goes without saying, if you genuinely can’t have kids then don’t but if all that means is you have to be more creative with dinner, use hand me downs, buy bunk beds. The more the merrier. I grew up with 4 siblings and I loved it. I’m a mom who lives away from them all and my sisters still love going through my clothes and taking what they can. But again, when living conditions are bad it’s of course a no. For the example you provided, that’s why people call cps. She needs to make a change, figure things out and declutter. It’s hazardous for children to live in hoarder spaces.