Wanna run away

I’m a new multi kid mom. I have a 3 year old I adore and a 2 week old. I’m getting enraged and yelling. Blowing up on him. I scare him I can tell. I’m just running out of patience and today my husband worked until bedtime at 7 pm. I feel like no one is understanding what I’m going through. They say they want to help if I need it but what I truly need to help me mentally they cannot give. I want to stop being a milk maid, and sleep. Leave this house and run away to a beach. I’m so tired of being a mom… I’m only 2 weeks into this. I just feel that hubby, bubs and I were just fine before. Idk why I put myself through this all over again. Then I feel bad for making that statement. I was so excited to have my rainbow baby.. now she’s here and I want to run away from them both… this Post partum depression phase is kicking my ass.

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I was in this same situation. Had no patience for anyone. Was yelling at my 2 year old for normal things. And then I yelled at the baby. A literal newborn. And I thought about hurting myself to be honest. It was a dark time. So I swallowed my pride and went to the doctor and got put on Wellbutrin. This (along side my normal anti anxiety) really helped me. On particularly rough days I still get the “run away” feeling. But baby is 5 months old and it has gone down like 90%.

Post partum can be more than just post partum depression, I would suggest talking to your mental health professional about post partum rage. I had really bad post partum rage because my baby daddy was getting high from the day she was born on Father’s Day (so June) until December when I finally fully left. Once I left him my issues subsided a lot but I still have them. Talk to someone who isn’t a friend or family member, sometimes just talking to an unbiased person helps a lot

No helpful input, but just want to say thank you for sharing this. I have a 2 year old boy who’s VERY active, stubborn, super sensitive, fussy eater, aggressive with his love and slaps on my face when I get distracted for a minute for attention even when I have been actively present a long time before. I’m due to have an elective section a couple weeks from now and I have been worried sick with how to cope and navigate what would already be a difficult time, with him around this time, not understanding why mummy can’t be as present, etc!! This was raw and real and I already feel seen if that even makes sense! It’s just reminded me of what to expect and has made me feel that I wouldn’t be alone. Finally - I agree with Haley. Please ask for professional help and don’t suffer through it. You don’t have to. You’ve got this and it IS temporary and my favourite saying is “This too shall pass” Hugs xx

@everyone thank you for the thoughts. I found out it’s definitely worse with lack of sleep. But matters were made worse someone hit my dog with a school bus. So now sadly my son has lost his only friend to play with.

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