when to know it’s time
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Ran out of words. I would ask if you feel like you can hold the space to allow that conversation and let go of the hurt that he has caused you to find a way forward. to do that you need to seriously consider if you love him or the idea of a family. Because they are two separate relationships and need to be viewed as such.
@Krysta I feel like I keep giving my all, I keep trying and yes maybe there was a time when I forgot what it was to be a partner but he is constantly giving up on me. I asked him if he wanted me to leave, he did not hesitate when he said yes. I am planning on leaving tomorrow, he has said too much, and I can see it in his eyes that he doesn’t want to try anymore
Then I think you have your answer, from here you need to take of yourself , heal and grieve before trying to find the way forward for your family and what that looks like. I hope you're okay.
I feel like you already know what you have to do, and what you want to do, but you're asking people to tell you to do it so, technically, you don't have to be the person to make the decision. I say that as someone who understands because I was in a relationship that I let carry on for way longer than it should have. From what you've said, I don't think there's anywhere to go from here. You say he keeps giving up on you so I think it's probably time to give up on him now, walk away and heal yourself. The older your daughter gets, the more she's going to see, feel and understand. She needs to see mummy happy, and being treated right. I hope you manage to get through this in one piece 💜
There is too much of only one side of this story to determine who is right or wrong, however, it sounds like you do not feel heard or validated in your relationship which is never an easy place to be. I have been in a similar situation to you, we went to counselling and I realised that even though I felt like I was in the right and he wasnt listening that alot of the arguments would get out of hand because we weren't listening to each other and he wanted to be validated for his feelings and experience exactly like me. It wasnt going anywhere until one day the counsellor said if neither of you want to change your relationship will fail and you should just stop wasting each others time. So we decided that to stay together and communicate was better than leaving the relationship and 4 years later we got engaged. A relationship will always fail if both sides give up and fall out of love at the same time, but to succeed it requires work, communication and trust to prosper. Love and children are not enough.