How do you deal with a miscarriage? 🥺😢

I am so sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage in 2021, at 7 weeks along. Started bleeding so went into hospital, had an ultrasound that showed a baby in the sac with a very slow heartbeat. The next day I passed the baby 💔so I can understand the pain of seeing a living baby then losing them…so awful and traumatic. I used to blame myself too, it was a surprise pregnancy and I was anxious about it cuz my partner and I weren’t living together at the time…so I thought maybe I didn’t love the baby enough to make them stay 💔 but as time as passed I’ve come to realize that is simply not the case. Just like it wasn’t my fault, it’s not yours either or your partners fault. Not having the right energy doesn’t cause a miscarriage….25% of pregnancies end in the first trimester usually due to genetic or chromosome issues. Sending love and healing ❤️‍🩹

I would suggest looking for support groups on facebook or instagram. They helped me soooo much as well as counselling.

@Mariah I don’t have social media this platform is my only connection to other moms…

@Mariah I think him telling me it wasn’t the right energy is him trying to make me feel better … I’m all about the energy. But my doctor did mention I didn’t do anything to make this happen, and mentioned the genetic or chromosome issue stating that this is a silent pain that a lot of women go through. Unfortunately, we don’t hear too much about it. I’m just so devastated.

Everyone process grief differently, but things I’ve done is get a ring with both the birthstone of the due date and the miscarriage, and I wear it everyday. Also on the day of the miscarriage my sister in law bakes a cake, because you can never sad when eating cake. We also buy a Christmas decoration every year in their memory and hang it up on the banister of the stairs, where no other decorations are( we will stop when it’s been 18 years)

I lost my baby at 13.5 weeks. We heard heartbeat at 8 weeks and thought everything was fine. Just to get to our 12w scan and find out there was no heartbeat anymore and baby stopped growing. I miscarried at home and saw baby. Saw his eyes and his perfect fingers and toes. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I blamed myself. My body failed me in carrying the pregnancy and then failed to tell me something was wrong. I couldn’t trust my body anymore. As mentioned upon, seeking therapy or support of a pregnancy loss or fertility councillor made a big difference for me. Also knowing how stupid common miscarriages are helped ease my mind a bit. It’s the body’s way of dealing with something that could’ve been a problem later. Like if the baby had some sort of genetic disorder or wouldn’t survive outside the womb, the body sort of cuts its losses early. Which still hurts and sucks.

It's nothing to do with energy IMO, so don't torture yourself with this. Myself and my partner argued ALOT during my pregnancy, and we had a healthy baby girl in May 2024! We weren't even talking at the first scan, it was awful tbh. These things happen sometimes, it's your body's way of flushing out a fetus that isn't developing properly (sorry for the terminology. Men deal with these things differently, so just because he appears to be holding it together better than you doesn't mean he's not upset by it. They are more logical/practical thinkers, so in his head you can just try again and chances are, things will be fine x

I went on to have a very healthy and complication free pregnancy and have a beautiful baby boy right now. Having a miscarriage doesn’t affect your fertility. Or future pregnancies. It’s hard to just accept that shit happens but that’s sorta how I rolled with it. But talking to someone certainly helped. And talking about it helped. I shared on social media and with my colleagues and friends. And I was overwhelmed by the support and how many other women had gone through the same thing. There’s a hospital near me (in Canada) that has a support program for pregnancy loss. I’d check out your local hospitals and see if they have the same. Just know you did NOTHING wrong. And that your baby knew they were loved every minute of their life. ❤️ https://pailnetwork.sunnybrook.ca

We had a little ceremony for him and buried him in a black plant. We named him Blake meaning dark one (as it was a dark moment). We said a few words and we light candles for him on his conception date, due date, birthdate. I also explored getting a tattoo and someone else has shared (beautiful by the way) but we immediately started trying again and can’t get tattoos when pregnant - wishful thinking. I did also dye and cut my hair completely different than usual. I just needed a change. To feel like a new person.

I’m so sorry ur going thru this! I had a miscarriage in May 2023. My son was only 2 yrs old & we weren’t trying for another baby at all when I found myself pregnant. I started to bleed which I thot was normal cuz Ive bled before during pregnancy bt I just knew something was off! so I was preparing myself for the worst at our 1st appt. My ob didn’t take ultra sound appt until at 8 weeks so that’s when I went & found the sac bt there was no heartbeat. My ob explained that it sounds like the baby had been passing naturally bt to wait for “it” And sure enough I went home that Friday & passed the rest of the baby that weekend. I remember it vividly cuz It was Memorial Day & I was having the worst painful contractions & I just kept passing large tissue & clots until the pregnancy was all gone. It was terrible, bt I knew it wasn’t my fault that I had a miscarriage & I just wasn’t supposed to or meant to have that baby! I learned a lot & realized how common it is to have a miscarriage.

Sending you healing thoughts.. it’s a horrid time and I’m sorry you’re going through it. I had a miscarriage at 10.5wks before my little rainbow girl was conceived, we had just started to relax into it and had told our closest family members. You’ll grieve and cry and still think of what could’ve been years down the line, but you have to know that there was a real reason that that little seed couldn’t stick around, medical reason - not because of you or how they were created. I like to think, like others said, your body identified problems early on and saved you the heartache and even more attachment that you would’ve had, had it stuck around longer. I think our bodies are incredible and you will pick yourself and try again and I’m sure things will be different next time xx

Bt just because they are common doesn’t make it hurt any less! So I’m so sorry for ur loss mama! Trully sorry! I think in my situation I was able to move past it cuz I didn’t plan the pregnancy. So that was my coping mechanism when I found out I was miscarrying. Cuz my first born was 100% planned bt when my husband & I found out we was pregnant again when my kid was only 2, that was unplanned & I really didn’t know how to feel abt it! So idk maybe God was punishing me for not being “grateful” or as excited as I shud have been etc. bt long story short mama, I can completely relate to ur story. So many things can go thru our minds wen we loose pregnancies bt just know there was nothing u cud have done. Miscarriages are common, not all pregnancies & labor will end in a healthy births & babies. And thats just the reality of the situation, a hard pill to swallow for sure. It’s sucks for u & I bt jus know we are not alone x

Unfortunately it is something that just happens with no rhyme or reason but it is really hard not to blame yourself. I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks. No heartbeat at any scans, growth so had to wait longer in case it was just too early (this was after 5 years of trying). I got pregnant with my rainbow baby just shy of a year later. She's 2.5 now.

@Anastasia that’s really beautiful memorial you idea

Also, our midwife was super sweet when I had to go in to meet her after my miscarriage. She said we could try for another baby. But just to be sure our hearts were ready & my husband and I were on the same page.. and a year later our son was born! I also told him about the tattoo. So sometimes he’ll wave hi to the baby and blow kisses too. Just know you’re not alone. What also made me feel more comforted was how many people I knew who had miscarried and came to support me. Because it’s not really talked about. But when I saw family & friends who had gone through what I did made me feel a little more at ease. 💗

@Alana wow I’m sorry for your loss, there so many of us who go through this i didn’t even know…. 🥺😢

@Alana awww that’s beautiful!!! I am going to go and get my hair done next week new color

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. You are not alone and it’s absolutely not your fault. My husband and I went through this three years ago. You have to allow yourself to grieve but also get the support you need. I went to this support group, it’s completely free and virtual. https://www.rachelsgift.org/infant-loss-support-groups

I’m so sorry for your loss💜 It’s not about energy at all, sometimes God needs them more than we do. I am praying your heart heals I would recommend to read Job from the Bible and I hope this helps!

I forgot to add in my long ass comments to please be open & Talk abt it to anyone who is willing to listen even tho it can be a triggering topic. Bt I found out that being open my miscarriage allows me to not only heal bt I get to connect with women who have been in similar situations and that’s when I realized I wasn’t alone! I think a lot of things are “taboo” to discuss when it comes to pregnancy bt I didn’t know just how common miscarriages were until it happened to me bt I wish I would have known abt pregnancy loss before my own experience. Make sure u talk abt it, it spreads awareness bt also keeps the memory of ur loss or child alive & helps u heal! Sending positive vibes

I can feel you, I had a miscarriage in December, I was 11 weeks. Everyone processes it differently. I send you hugs and love. You will heal but you will not forget ❤️

I’m sorry for your loss. I’ve had 2 myself. 💕 You will mourn this because it is a loss even if you didn’t get to meet this child, it was still your child. Everyone grieves miscarriages differently and that’s normal! Miscarriages aren’t due to something you did tho

I don’t think my partner is comprehending what happened because he’s acting like normal and I look crazy to cry… to me I just lost a child, like it was developing in my body, I felt it’s presence within me, I felt the difference in my body, in my heart in my soul, I new I had another soul inside me…. I’m even more sad that my mom whom I told I was pregnant, we had a conversation today and she for some reason asked me if I took something and I said I wish I did to numb the pain I’m in, and she had the audacity to say what do I have to be sad about, and I burst into tears wow, how dare you, like your no longer a friend of mine, and I no longer will confide with you ever again, how dare you tell me what do I have to be sad about, I still haven’t miscarried the baby is still inside me… my heart is drowning in tears and sorrow 🙁. How could someone be so insensitive !! It just happened not more then 2 days ago. Am I supposed to be okay in their minds? This is so crazy how no one gives a

Crap about anything