Best friends or lovers

How far pp are you? Have you had a night just you two ? I know it’s so hard not wanting to leave baby but me and my partner did this my little boy is 2 months old. My little boy went to my in laws and myself and partner had a date night, it was perfect! Really helped us. And we made a rule no phones on an evening when he got in from work. It was for us to talk or even just sit in silence sometimes but to be together. Xx

@Ellie I’m 8 and a half months postpartum, we had one night early on but I ended up sleeping through it and we had one a week ago, that went alright I just wish when we would do the stuff we used to do like cuddling and everything I could actually feel present all how I used to when we would, now I just feel so disconnected and when he says cute stuff to me it makes me cringe for some reason like I don’t know how to respond anymore.. just feel very uncomfortable trying to be intimate now and I think a big part of it is me not feeling like myself anymore and not being confident but I just miss when we were best friends AND in love ALL the time :/

Can’t really tell u when u or ur partner wil feel like lovers again cuz all couples don’t handle the transition with a child the same way. So it’s hard to say. Some relationship don’t even survive this phase at all. Bt ya’ll have to keep trying of u want to make it work. I jus went on ur profile and saw that u posted 3weeks ago abt maybe having another kid bt I don’t think u shud even think abt having until u & ur partner get ur relationship were u want it to be cuz another pregnancy & baby is only going to make ur “bestfriend” relationship worst, cuz kids rarely bring couples together. kids usually tests the relationship & most ppl don’t pass. The more kids u bring into the relationship the further apart u will feel if u already feel that way with just one child. Try therapy or just communicating to see what can bring the spark back. X

I can relate to this some. I mean I still feel like we're lovers but the lack of intimacy is definitely stressful in a lot of ways. Plus there's a lot going on besides the baby too. I miss just being able to cuddle and watch TV together and being intimate sexually too. It's definitely not easy but I feel like communicating helps a lot. Also we both tell each other and ourselves that it won't be like this forever and that eventually we'll albe able to at least be in the same bed again. We also talk about how our daughter will be able to understand more when she gets a little older so that will help too.

we went through some phases like that the first year - year and a half of our daughters life. it’s tough, my advice is try to be really intentional about connecting with each other. not just physical intimacy but emotional too, spend time together just the two of you even if it’s just at home. talk about how you feel. it shouldn’t last forever so try to remember that, you’re both going through so many life changes

@Kayla oh bless you, I’m so sorry you’re not feeling yourself but don’t be so hard on yourself. Men don’t understand what we’ve been through and what we still go through daily and how hard it is. I’ve had these discussions with my partner and felt I couldn’t even have a second wrong myself. I hope for your own sake you get that spark back for yourself, with you partner and yourself. Just keep remembering you both created your beautiful child x

I literally said to my fiancé last night when he gave me a kiss on the cheek.. “ oh you do love me still” he couldn’t work out why I said that to him because in his little mind he thought everything was okay but in reality we were becoming more housemates than a couple.. We just had our first baby together five weeks ago so some nights have been tough. He has been sleeping on the couch and I’ve been sleeping in the bed and vice versa.

Girl …. When I tell you I saw this post and felt it in my core. Haha it took a while for us to get back and truth be told we’re not even 100%. We fight like crazy and we realize it’s cause well we’re not ourselves anymore. There’s been so much change with our baby who just turned 2. We now realized that we need to prioritize ourselves. For instance my husband makes it a goal for him to plan date night and for myself I make it a goal for me to be more affectionate towards him. It takes two. Be more intentional with your time and don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. We not share core memories of our past and it ignited a new flame for us. Put some lingerie on and go get him girl 😊