Constantly dismissed by my midwife.

I'm 36W with baby #2 and feel like I'm constantly dismissed by my midwife. I've met her 3 times and each meeting has been less than 15 minutes. I knew when I found out you have less appointments in your second pregnancy that things would be different but it's starting to bother me. I met her for the first time at 16W and she called me prior to the appointment to say that if I didn't want to attend, I don't have to. I went anyway as I wanted to meet her, I barely sat down before she took my urine sample and blood pressure and told me I was good to go. As I was leaving she asked how my mental health was and I told her I was stressed and worried because my mum has breast cancer and boyfriend had lost his job. She replied "oh normal day to day things then, you're fine". Honestly I was in and out within 5 minutes. Met her again at around 28W and she kept saying she doesn't need to tell me anything because I've been through it before and know how it all works. I told her that I don't and still have questions. She said to write them down and she'll answer them the next time she sees me and that was that. She came to my house today, I spent about an hour making sure the house was clean (stupid mistake on my part). From memory at this appointment we were supposed to talk about birth plans, pain management etc. She was in my house for 12 minutes. Again she said I've done it all before, know the signs of labour and what the pain medication options are like. She told me not to pack too much in my hospital and baby #2 will likely come quicker than my first. That was it. At this point I just keep thinking "what is even the point?" It's just starting to feel like a huge waste of time. They're only quick meetings/appointments but still take up a chunk of your day. It's such a shame because my first midwife was honestly lovely. She was so kind and it felt she really cared about me and my daughter. When I found out I was pregnant again I was looking forward to having her back but unfortunately she's changed areas.
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I would contact the midwife’s through your maternity contacts and ask to be seen by a different midwife!

I really think you need to contact the maternity service and let them know. This really is a poor service she’s providing and, whether you’re a second time mum or not, you should still be provided with a high level of midwifery - you’re still having a baby at the end of the day! My midwife appts haven’t been much different from the first time round to be fair (I haven’t had fewer appts either), the only difference is when she’s asked me if I want to discuss a birth plan etc I’ve said I don’t need to as I know I’m having an elective section, but it was my choice to not discuss that! This must be so frustrating for you - I’d be feeling the exact same!

I’m on second baby and mine sit with me talking for almost an hour every appointment and go through every little thing as though I’ve never heard it before because a lot of processes or procedures I obviously won’t be an expert on! Defo speak to your service and let them know as it’s unacceptable x

Oh no I’m so sorry you’ve had that experience, that’s not acceptable at all. I think I’ve seen my Midwive 4 times already (35 weeks now) and I have two more booked in. Each appointment has been about 40 minutes and done all the checks, she’s absolutely lovely, I even moved to a different county a month ago but travel to see the same Midwive because she’s been amazing. Definitely ask to see a different midwife, it’s never too late to see someone else! She should also be checking the heart beat and measuring baby? Have you had your bloods checked as well?

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