I’m lonely 🙃

Bit of background I was very social from 18-26. I (29) now live with my fiancée and 2 daughters (2 and 6 mo) 2 1/2 hours away from my hometown. I had a best friend for 11 years. It took me a while to realise how toxic it was. She would constantly ask for money and never give it back. Tell me she had a bad day so I’d go on nights out with her even when I had work the next morning. When I fell pregnant with my first her response was “oh,happy?” She knew I wanted to be a mum and me and my partner were trying. Half way through my pregnancy she basically ghosted me even after me asking how she was doing I’d get blunt replies. When I had my eldest daughter I sent a long message saying I was devastated about her lack of support and how I’ve always been there for her and how it felt one sided and the text back I received,well I’ve never felt so gaslit in my life! I have 3 other friends who now have 2 children so we’re all going through something similar so I made a group chat as we used to be close and when I started the group I stated that I thought this would be a nice place for us all to vent and support each other. The group was active for the first week but since then there’s been little interaction. I’m living in army housing which is known to be cliquey but luckily I haven’t gotten myself involved with anyone apart from my neighbour who has now moved away. I just really miss having a friend I could text about some inconvenience or some advice. I saw a therapist a few years ago and he mentioned about getting an assessment for Autism and ADHD but I haven’t. I know I struggle socially and it takes a lot for me to feel comfortable around people. I just really wish I had someone that isn’t my partner that I could rant to. I find myself messaging my mum but she’s not the most supportive and we have more of a friend relationship than a mother daughter. I just wanted to see if anyone’s been through something similar and did it get better for you?

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I’m very much the same way. I’m trying to be more open to like.. saying yes? Or meeting. But that’s become hard with a 3mnth old. I tend to feel like it’s trying to date someone. I feel like I’m trying to hard usually and then get ghosted. I have no solutions but you’re not alone ♥️

I found out my friend was toxic when I was getting married and she decided to go on solo trip to Asia, I told her 10 months in advance and 6months in advance of the date she called and told me she would fly out from Asia to be there, then texted me the next day saying she’s happy for me but this is the only time she has to do this for her self…. I have not made any real connection since then, we were friends for 10 years and she always stuck to my side while I was doing bad but once things started going good it’s like she all of sudden didn’t want to be my friend.

Hi, I know how you feel. I isolate myself from society. I have only my partner and son. When I go to drop my son off for school or pick him up I most of the time where headphones so I look unapproachable because I am listening to something. In reality it's just an avoidance technique so that other parents don't try to talk to me because I am so anxious and don't know what to say. Finding a good friend is like finding a new partner as @Alexis said. I've had many a toxic relationship and that's 1 of the main reasons I avoid others now. I don't know what to suggest other than saying don't give up. Keep trying for new friends and new connections because sometimes you need to go through hell to get to heaven. You will find some good friends I am sure if you keep looking. I am looking too here in Aus. You can text me if you need

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