Wanting another baby
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My daughter just turned 10 and I’m finally okay enough to give her a sibling. Her sister will be here (God willing) in August. It’s never too late. I’m 37 almost 38.
Maybe you can sign her up for some fun classes. I plan to do tumbling, art class and nature class for my 21 month old, although now being able to drive might make that difficult. They are usually just once a week class but might be different where you are
my sister and I are five years apart and we are so close. I’m so glad that my parents had her!!
You have not wasted half her childhood by not doing enough. Just time spent with her is enough 🫶🏻 however, you don't need a car to always go somewhere fancy. A nice walk in the woods is enough, the bluebells are out now! A walk to your local soft play? Make a day of it, get on the train and take a picnic with you somewhere?
My sister and I have a 11 year gap and even though we are in different stages(she in high school and I’m married and a mom of 2) we are still close and text several times a week and usually call each other every 10 days or so. I wouldn’t have a kid solely for your little one to have a sibling(which it sounds like you and you partner truly want another). I think it is totally valid for you to be scared to have another considering what you have been through and I send my condolences❤️
I’m really sorry about your losses. I can totally understand why you’re scared to try again. When I lost my first baby, I was scared to try again, but it was the best decision I’ve made, as now got a toddler. I went through the first loss pretty badly, I can’t even imagine how hard it must of been for you. So in my situation, there is a 5 year gap between me and my brother. Growing up together was awesome despite the fact that we’ve been at different stages of childhood. However, I’ve always wanted a sibling and we did a lot of things together growing up. I really enjoyed helping mum look after him, I loved to help teach him to walk and talk, we played together (for example I’d build us forts, or we’d play train made out of chairs and I’d sing nursery rhymes) there was honestly so so much we did. I taught him to ride a bike when he was 3, helped with potty training, we used to do competitions on bikes and races. We played together all the time. We get on really well as adults too x
I'm so sorry for your loss. My sister and I are 4.5 years apart, and we were always close. My husband and his sister are 4 years apart, too, and they are still close. I think it is a pretty good age gap.
Me and my sister are four years apart and a lot closer than my brother who is a year younger. When I go to have another child my son will be around your daughters age and that 100% okay
My daughter is 16 years younger than her oldest brother and they have the best friendship! Don't worry too much about the age gap, if you and hubby decide you want to try again. I am so sorry for your losses. I can't imagine. You are so strong, good job mama!
So dont think 5 year gap is bad! My little sister is 5 year behind me and my twin and we had an amazing relationship. We are super close! 5 year is still a pretty good age gap to still be able to play with the other. If that's the only thing holding you back then don't let it. Plus she's gonna love having a baby around to play dress up and stuff with. 🤭
Growing up I was super close to my brother (4 yr age gap) and now grown up, I talk to my sister daily (10 yr gap)
Definitely don't worry about the age gap, 5 years is nothing really! My 2nd child is 11 and his baby sister will be 1 in May, he adores her! 😍. My 1st and 2nd also have a 4 year gap and are very close x
I’m so sorry for everything you have been through too i’m not surprised you’re reluctant to go again! I just wanted to say if you do give it another go my little sister was 6 years younger than me and her being born was one of the best things that could happen to me, I took care of her from the moment she came home and she is still my best friend to this day 25 years on! But as I say, tooootally understand if you don’t want to go through it all again! If you really wanted another could adoption be a potential path? Otherwise she’ll be okay! I’m sure she gets loads of love and attention from you! Does she have play dates etc?
I grew up an only child as my parents had fertility issues after me and honestly once I got to school age and had friends life was less lonely. My own perspective is my oldest is 5.5 and my youngest is 7 months so there's almost a 5 year gap there and their relationship is beautiful my oldest loves her younger sister so much and enjoys making her laugh and getting all the smiles and honestly my youngest looks for her sister all the time so I think they'll have an incredible bond. I'm sorry for your losses and I understand your fear (I had a miscarriage between my daughters). I would say if you feel another child would add to your family then when you're ready for it start that journey x
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I’m so sorry for your loss. My sister is 7years older than me and we still have a very strong bond. I’m so grateful for her. Yes growing up we didn’t play in terms of toys etc but we still shared a room and now we both have kids, we are a lot closer. Her kids and mine are best friends.
There's 5.5 years between me and my younger brother, we have always been close. Obviously we went through stages of not getting in but as adults we do, we get together with our families, we have 2 holidays booked. In contrast, my husband is 18 months older than his brother and they barely have a relationship and haven't gotten on since childhood. I don't think the age gap necessarily matters, it's the personality of the children. My son was 3.5 when his sister was born and he adores her, it sounds like your daughter would be a great big sister, so hopefully the age gap wouldn't matter.
So sorry for your losses. As others have said, age gap really doesn’t affect their playing. I have a 6 year age gap and now they are 8 and 2 and play together all the time! I think the bonus of not being close in age is that they aren’t scrapping with each other 😂
My mum waited until I was 9 to have my brother I was very lonely and hated having no sibling. We wasn’t exactly close as kids due to having such a gap plus opposite genders (so different intrests) however now at 25 and 16 we’re great friends x
I’m so sorry for your losses. I just wanted to say that all age gaps can create special sibling relationships. My 8 year old and 3 year old are 5 years apart and play together everyday. I teach high school and multiple students are getting siblings at 15, 16, 17 years old, obviously it’s not the same type of playing together but they go on to have very special sibling relationships. Whatever age gap you end up with it will be ok!