Lo got bitten at nursery

Is it the same child as last time? I have always said "once then ok, twice ok but what's in place? Three times then I'm cross". Kids will absolutely be kids and it happens, just checking what's happening to reduce it? I will add I am the mum of a child who can hit/throw in frustration and we are working a lot with the nursery on this, but that to me is the important bit. They should be able to tell you (vaguely at least) what is in place. Unfortunately though this is just quite the age we are in. Still obviously horrible for you and your child!

I’ve had the same problem with my little girl being bitten and scratched by a little boy in the 3-5 room. First it started with biting, one occasion on her chin, and another separate incident on her arm. They used the excuse that this little boy was just settling in and that he was finding the adjustment hard. I let that slide but wasn’t happy. Another incident happened where he scratched her on the arm with both his hands, again said he was settling in and then he took his nails down her face, that’s when I had to step in and say something. I asked that they make sure where possible the children are kept in separate groups, (inside/outside, different snack/lunch times, different toilet groups) and try their best to have them in separate activities at any given time. I obviously know they can’t completely isolate the other child but try to make sure there’s less situations where they’re near each other or kept preoccupied by different things.

@Emma Thanks for replying. Yeah it was the same child. You are right, I think I will message the nursery tomorrow and ask what procedures are in place, thanks x

@Megan Thanks Megan. How are things now? Did the nursery do this and did it help? X

@Jennifer things seem to have settled thankfully, it was happening frequently and it’s been around 3 or so months since I had that discussion with them and nothing else has been mentioned! They seem to have been pretty proactive about things and when I have went in to collect my daughter, the other child has always been in separate areas away from her 🤞🏼 you do have to start questioning why is this always happening to my child and also so unprovoked too like innocently sitting chatting/drawing at a separate table. I hope things resolve for you and your wee one 🥰

@Jennifer hello also from Dundee, just noticed on your profile 😂👋🏻

@Jennifer if she was bitten by the same child and your daughter has informed you of this I would be asking the Nursery to have a staff member shadowing that child to ensure it doesn't happen again🤷‍♀️

@Megan I'm about 15 miles away over the bridge, in Fife. Small world xx

@Emma they’re not allowed to disclose which child for safety reasons

Unfortunately I’m a Mum of a son that’s gone through bouts of scratching & hitting so I can only imagine the child’s Mum is just as distraught as you and super embarrassed. Some children display this behaviour for multiple reasons. With mine it’s due to potential ADHD which he receives extra support with and they recognise triggers (it being too busy in the room, too loud etc) but sometimes even then it happens. All they can do is recognise the child’s triggers and try their best to eliminate them, keep her away from certain people, talk to her about being kind, emotions etc. It’s hard as at this age it’s developmentally normal for some children to struggle with this. It’s hard to know what to do for both sides. All you can do is make them aware you want them to do their best to help both children stay safe. Xx

@Ashley I know hun. Was meaning had her daughter told her x

@Megan unfortunately some children may be targets for multiple reasons, if they don’t give the child attention/no interest in playing, if they are too vocal or not vocal enough, etc etc. Realistically we don’t know the full picture as we aren’t there the whole day. X

@Jennifer I think that's totally fair. They probably cant give many details but they should be able to tell you something. X

@Emma I guess they’re at the age where the child can say the child in questions name, rather than the nursery. I can only imagine the kids at my sons nursery saying Oscar did it 🫣😬

@Ashley I feel you hun, as mine would be "It was Rory". We are also the potential ADHD and speech and language delay. He's doing really well but it's the long game xxx

@Emma it’s hard as I feel like a lot of the time people assume the parents aren’t doing enough but we’ve done everything we can possibly do. Books galore, emotion charts, role play, but it still occasionally happens. It’s disheartening. But one day it’ll all be in the past! X

@Ashley absolutely xx if you ever need a chat just drop me a message. I get it xx

@Ashley totally understand that. I've never once blamed the child or the parent. I'm just wondering what I should be asking the nursery to be doing to safe guard my 3 year old. It's very upsetting for her and this morning she has been crying and begging not to go as she is "scared and sore" No child should be scared to go to nursery x

@Jennifer yeah that’s sad. If it’s a good nursery they should have things in place to support both children. It might be worth mentioning your daughter is scared. Unfortunately some parents do blame the other parent, I’ve had parents give me dirty looks. I’m glad you’re more understanding x

I would definitely contact the nursery and ask what measures are going to happen for this to stop continuing to happen. X

My little one has come home with bites and also bitten. I think it’s just a phase they go through. But obviously it is an issue if it’s the same girl, have they mentioned if the other child has SEND? As this can effect how they learn/ react etc.