Boy mums

We have 5 boys. All are circumcised. No downside. I left the decision up go dad. I don't have a penis, so it was his final call. You're going to get a LOT of very passionate replies. However, I will say, getting it done as an adult is much greater risk involved, more pain (and that they remember), longer recovery, etc. The only person who really matters in this conversation is you and baby's father. Consult with your pediatrician, maybe even a urologist, as it's their field of expertise, and they see all sides of the conversation from a medical perspective daily.

I don’t believe in circumcision none of the men in my family are and neither are my boys. Just teach to clean once they are old enough and you shouldn’t have any issues and my oldest is nearly 17. If it weren’t supposed to be there then it wouldn’t be

I honestly think it is genital mutilation and should be against the law (with exceptions for absolute medical reasons). If a man who can give his own consent as an adult wishes to have the procedure done, they can. But I honestly think it’s so gross to mutilate a little baby boys body like that 🥺 My partner is Muslim by birth and circumcised and I’ve told him categorically that we are not doing that if we have boys.

My husband and I were advised by a pediatric urologist to have our son circumcised to help prevent UTI. Our son has a urinary reflux so a UTI could cause a kidney infection, which we wouldn’t want to happen, especially in a baby. We did the circumcision and all is fine now. However, it’s important to keep an eye on your baby after the procedure. We were told to watch for any active bleeding or excessive bleeding (think diaper filling with blood or seeing blood actively flowing). My son had active bleeding a few hours after his procedure and it requires a trip to the hospital. He ended up staying overnight, got a compression bandage, and if the compression bandage had not helped he would have needed stitches (which we were told only a pediatric surgeon would have been able to do). The compression bandage worked, our son got a good clot, and he healed up just fine. Can’t even tell there was that issue.

Would also add that it’s not common at all in the U.K. (usually associated with religious or cultural context) I know it’s a much more common procedure in America.

So my partner wants to get it done as he had to have it done cos of medical issues when he was 7/8 and his dad also did around the same age. So his thoughts are get it done then he won’t remember it as he was a baby and won’t have the issues he and his dad did

Unless it’s for medical reasons then it’s unnecessary. As parents, it’s our job to teach our kids how to wash and clean themselves properly and if you do that then there are no issues. I have 3 boys who haven’t been done and I’ve had no issues with any of them. In America it’s more common because they’re misinformed about caring for their child. Foreskins shouldn’t be forcefully retracted to be cleaned and it seems they are doing it and causing the UTIs and infections. Just because your partner has a penis, doesn’t make him entitled to make decisions about another person’s body just because they have the same genitals. If your son wishes to have it done when he’s older, he should be able to make that decision about his body himself.

Up to you and dad . There are obviously pros and cons. I feel like if it’s something you guys want go for it - they don’t remember it if they are young and the recovery time is easier then adult male . When we was deciding with my little one ( for religious reasons - it was sure we would do it either way ) my husband one was done as baby and he doesn’t remember but says is thankful that his mum / dad has done it as he has never had any infections his brother was done when he was a bit older ( around 8 ) and the recovery was much harder but again says he doesn’t regret his parents doing it and it doesn’t bother him either way .

My husband and I did a lot of research to decide what was best for our son and we decided on not circumcising our son . I feel in my personal opinion just because you don’t have the penis counts you out in the decision . My husband is not circumcised as well but even he wanted to do research before he just decided to not do it because that’s what normal to him. It is important to read about it and decide what pros are important to you and what will work for your family and that you and your partner decide together .

i like to think there are no cons to keeping his skin on his body lmao

We circumcised our son and I wish I had not. My partner was for circumcising him. He is my first and I really did not know where I stood with it. It seemed to be so normal and I feel like I was pushed to because of those around me. If I could go back I wouldnt have honestly!!

Hi I’m in the same situation. I think this is one of those “if it’s not an enthusiastic yes by both parents it should be a no” cases. At the end of the day you are the mother and you know what’s best for your baby. If you don’t want it done don’t let him convince you. A lot of women “leave it up to the dad” if they don’t care one way or another but it seems you have an opinion which means you get to have your say.

We got it done my son was literally perfectly fine. I see there are a lot more votes on let him decide later on but truthful that seems more complicated and could be harder to deal with it’s between you and your husband though

I say do it. It will keep the area cleaner once he starts using it on his own I would think.? My son is only two but we got it done for him and it healed pretty quick too!

I personally believe in circumcision, but if you’re unsure just ask your partner for some time to think about it. I remember my brothers got circumcised at ages 5 and 7. It doesn’t have to be a NOW thing. There’s time to discuss, research, to weigh out pros and cons and to really understand and make an educated decision. Wishing you a healthy pregnancy and a healthy delivery x

The foreskin is there to prevent bacteria getting into the urethra, as well for pleasure in adulthood. It's absolutely diabolical to perform unnecessary surgery on a child because people can't be arsed to learn how to clean it properly. I have two boys, who both have perfectly intact, clean penises and I've never met a man who was or ever needed to be circumcised. (UK)

I have 5 sons who are all done. No issues, we both agreed to have them done from the 20 week scan of our 1st son. Never a drama, they know they are done and some guys/boys aren't and honestly it isn't talked about as far as I'm aware lol I hate the way people bring others down for doing it or even not doing it! It's our choice as a parent what we want to do and if any of my boys decided when they have sons they don't want to then that is their choice and I won't have a say.

I can definitely see why your partner wants to go with doing it now and not worry about having to get it done older. My friend had it done as a teenager for medical reasons and it was horrific and then working in a nursing home I've had few of the older gentleman need to be done and it's so sad but they had to.

I left it up to my husband. He was leaning towards getting it done but as soon as the baby came out he decided he’s perfect as is and we shouldn’t mess with anything. The doctor told us we were making the right choice as it’s an unnecessary medical procedure and ofc they always come with risks. That being said 99 percent of the time it’s fine.

I lost our boy due to preterm labor but my plan was to leave it up to dad , I don’t have the part so I feel it’s not my decision . Ofc it’s my child but I personally felt like thats a father’s decision if the father is present .A lot of boys end up having issues as they get older but some don’t my thought process was would I rather have something done quickly and easily after baby was born or have a more risky painful healing process once they were older if they needed it.

So I'm firm believer of it bc lets be honest. Boy are gross. They won't clean it right. My oldest SS we have to get him done bc he keeps getting bad infections. They say do it while they are little that way they won't remember it. My sister also works in hospital and she's had trauma patients like 16 17 years old coming in having to get circumcised bc the infection is so bad. It's not worth the risk is my thing. My 1 year old got it done right after birth and he's perfectly fine. No trauma no nothing. He's perfectly healthy. 👌🏼

I would let your son decide when he’s older cause it’s his body his decision

@Brianna with that pov, you'd be treating the side effect of the problem, not the root cause? why? they'd be walking around with funky crotches, foreskin or not, if they don't keep the area in general.... so why are we just chopping skin off instead of teaching the kid to clean it 💀? thats the easy way out!

@destiny 🪬 you can try to teach them to clean it but at the end of the day whether they do it or not is not in your hands. You do you, but I'm not risking anything with my child. There's been horror stories where my sister had to take the actual penis bc of bad infections from foreskin. You say there's no cons in keeping the skin, well i can say the same about not keeping the skin. You believe what you believe and ill believe what I believe. Even my husband who isn't circumcised told me that he wanted us to do it bc foreskin causes alot of problems and is a hassle then anything. Fact of the matter we'll never know bc were females not males. And waiting until they are older to make the decision is ridiculous bc that's more trauma that the kid has to endure then if you would've just gotten it done as a baby.

@Brianna yes totally agree! It’s not worth the health risks

I straight up told my boyfriend I wasn't doing it. He hadn't done any research and was going based off old beliefs that his family taught him about it being less hygienic and he said "well I'm circumcised so what if one day he sees mine and asks why they're different?" And I told him "you say everyone's body is different." I made him do research and he FINALLY agreed with me that we shouldn't do it. It's a good thing we didn't because my son has hypospadias and they have to use his foreskin to reconstruct how his urethra SHOULD be and it's a common issue. 1 in 200 babies have it. If we had circumcised him then they'd have to use artificial materials to fix it.

No no and no! There’s not reason to do this to little boys, sorry but it’s not necessary unless it’s a medical reason… would you do FGM if you had a girl?! It’s the same thing.. 😭😭

@Abie this. I’m due with #2 soon and dad still wants to circumcise and I do NOT

I’m going to be honest. I’m not going to say genital mutilation or anything as my sons done, though I do see their point. Lithe foreskin covers the head which is essentially the clitoral good covering the clit. A bundle of nerves. In rare cases they can bleed out, loose feeling, or have too much cut off that it is painful to get an erection. They also do technically loose length when they are circumsized vs left whole. There is no medical reason it is not cleaner, safer, better etc. it’s been proven not to hurt too much as a baby sugar water on a binky is just as effective as a numbing shot. Healing is easy, he never noticed when I cleaned it. But he’s had a few diaper rashes that ate at the tip/opening that I can confirm if he had been left whole would never have been a problem. I’m due with #2 and I refuse to get him done. His father wants him don’t like he wanted our eldest done, and I refuse. While the videos are not horrific or scary or whatever, I don’t see a reason

@Brianna there are actual cons to it though and that's not a matter of opinion 💀? and waiting until they're older makes more sense because nobody's going through 'trauma' if HE makes the choice himself..? and plz don't embarrass your husband LOL if it's a hassle for him to clean his dick properly then idk, sounds like he's one of the funky crotches yall are letting walk around to me. cause what problems does it cause? what hassle?

The risks of having it done far out way the risks of leaving it. If not done he has a chance of it becoming too tight and needing medically done, UTIs if sensitive, wanting it done later, or someone not wanting to be with him sexually because it’s not cut which in my opinion is a bullet dodged. Whereas getting it done risks bleeding out, infections during heeling, painful erections, less pleasurable intercourse, loss of length, the list goes on. To me I would rather him have autonomy over his body and choose later on to which I will pay for, over choosing for him and him wishing I hadn’t or have issues because I chose for him. Ultimately it’s your decision with dad’s input taken in. Just remember if you regret doing it there’s no going back, but if you regret leaving it it can always be done. One more thing its not a medical requirement it’s a chosen cosmetic surgery so my insurance didn’t cover it and I have state insurance. It cost me over $800 out of pocket to have it done..

@destiny 🪬 excuse you? I'm not saying he has a hassle of cleaning himself. And guess what? I'm not saying there aren't cons of getting it done. But there are also cons of not getting it done. Suit yourself on what you do to your child. At the end of the day there isnt a right or wrong on this subject. It's always gonna be a controversial subject, so don't come at me just bc my opinion is different then yours. You think you shouldn't then fucking don't. I'm going do it. And yes it cause more trauma to an older child bc they remember it and it takes longer to heal. How about do some more research on that front. Right now all your doing is being complete jerk to some random person. You've stated your opinion so be done. I'm not arguing with some rando on the internet. I've said my piece and now I'm done. We have different opinions. SO LEAVE IT ALONE!

@Brianna calm down brianna, breathe lmao. nobody's coming for you, yall just don't know how to have a debate without getting butthurt 💀 like yea no...it's not causing trauma on anybody who is making the decision as an older person cause they consented to the healing process. just experiencing pain in general isn't gonna traumatize somebody. this infantilization of men is so overrated omg. its work to clean my ass every day but i do it so? what excuse do they have?

@Chandra I cackled I’m so sorry 💀😂

@Chandra lol I most certainly did laugh at that. 🤣 yes we can all agree that they should be cleaned lmao.

If my partner wanted this if we had a boy I’d support it as my partner was circumcised due to health reasons so think it would be the best choice xx

While I have 50/50 feelings on it, I’m leaving the decision up to my husband. I’m due with a baby boy in 2 months and we will be having him circumcised as soon as we can. I feel it’s best to leave it up to my husband because he actually has a penis and understands what it’s like to live with one/ take care of it. I’ll never understand what it’s like to have a penis. Similarly, he’s left it up to me to decide to pierce my daughter’s ears at a young age and handle any future situations regarding her private parts. A father should definitely have a say in this conversation, and it’s honestly nobody else’s business.

If not both of you agree then it’s a no.

If it’s not medically necessary I don’t see why people choose to do this. My brother had it done for medical reasons but other than that I don’t know a single person who has had it done and if I’m being completely honest I wouldn’t have a clue how to work with that as a sexual partner. Having said that I also don’t agree with people piercing their baby’s ears which I feel strongly about because as a 30 year old woman I can hand on heart say that I have never wanted my ears pierced so I’m glad nobody took that option away from me

There’s plenty of research showing the health benefits of it, my son had a circumcision when he was little so there wasn’t a bad experience, he watched tv while it happened, he didn’t even realise what was happening, thats why doing it when they’re little helps them not recall anything, my husband agrees that it’s helped him physically in the long run in life.

This is tough because if it’s to be like dad and for religious beliefs I think it’s ok to get it done. I have a boy and I absolutely didn’t and wouldn’t but that’s because dad isn’t and I’m not religious! There are very little risks in most countries now of getting it done or not getting it done so from a health perspective it’s not necessary to do or not to do. Do what’s it’s your heart. There is also nothing wrong with your little one having a penis that isn’t like dads.

I don't that think not having a penis means that as his mother your opinion is not valid. You're still able to read up on all of the same information. I believe that it should be left up to him to decide whether he wants the procedure done in the future. I'd rather risk them having to do it later on than potentially having less sexual pleasure or other issues and knowing that we, as his parents, are responsible for it.

@lale there are no health benefits to getting it done. There are plenty of benefits of NOT doing it though. If he keeps himself clean then there usually isn't an issue. It's rare a man NEEDS it done as an adult.

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3684945/

Circumcision is a religious thing 100% from abrahamic religions (Islam, Judaism and then Christianity) . Has nothing to do with US or U.K. or whatever. It has its pros as well as its cons. If you’re going to do it, do it very early and baby will never remember. Doing it once one can remember can be pretty traumatic. If you don’t do it, all the same it’s fine. It’s literally like getting a baby girls ears pierced, some cry about it that it’s wrong but for some cultures it’s done almost immediately after baby is born. But I agree with the comment above that said do it only if it is a firm yes by both mum and dad.

@Olivia I wouldn't compare it to getting a baby's ears pierced. One can heal over so is reversible, the other is not.

@Megan I’m talking about from the faith culture perspective of getting it done and when.

@Ace Not all males keep themselves clean even if they know better and of course there are health benefits to circumcision… - Easier hygiene. makes it simpler to wash the penis - Lower risk of urinary tract infections - Lower risk of sexually transmitted infections - Prevention of penile problems - Lower risk of penile cancer. So what’s the plenty of benefits of not doing it?

@Olivia it's not like getting a baby girl's ears pierced. It's like cutting her lips off her vagina. Same thing. It's not traumatic to get it done when they're older, men are just infantilized in the health care system. My grandma literally had a C-section without being numb at all and wasn't given any pain meds to bring home afterwards. THAT'S traumatizing. I went into labor 3 times and had constant contractions for 17 weeks. That's traumatizing. Being put under and not feeling anything then healing with pain meds from something people force onto infants isn't traumatizing.

@Ace it’s scientifically proven that women have a higher pain threshold than men! And I responded to Megan about the comparison being from a faith culture perspective of getting it done and when