Sleep help

For context, I’m 39 weeks pregnant with a 3.5 year old. My daughter has always slept badly, needs a lot of support to fall asleep, wakes in the night and needs me to go and comfort her or comes into our bed. I honestly don’t mind it, however I’m worried about how we’re going to manage this with a newborn! If she knows I’m in the house, she won’t let my husband put her to bed or go in during the night. She’ll literally scream and panic that I’m not with her then it ends up taking ages to get her down again. He’s really great with her but just spends less time with her as he works full time (often in the evenings too) and I’m a stay at home mum so she has a strong preference for me. It’s also frustrating/upsetting for him when she has that reaction so we don’t really know how to deal with it. I have no idea how we’re going to cope when the baby arrives, I’ll be breastfeeding and not pumping initially so he can’t help with the night feeds, which means he really needs to take over with our 3 year old but we’re not sure how to approach the transition for her! Any advice please?!
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Could you try bedtime/nighttime wakes with both of you for a few nights and then transition to just him? My 3year old is difficult if my husband puts her to bed but Ive taken a step back the last 2 months and now she will go to sleep for either of us, just takes a bit longer if it's him as she prefers me to do bedtime

So sorry I have no solutions but just wanted to say I could have written this myself- totally in the same boat with my 2 year old! You are not alone!

We had this with my son as I usually did bed time and he generally prefers me however once I found out I was pregnant we had to get a bit firmer on the fact that sometimes dad does bed sometimes I do and it’s the same for if he wakes a night he gets who he gets. We had a tough night here and there (the first was the worst) but stick to your guns even if it means you putting headphones on or leaving the house. Your other half will find his own ways to do things as well which will help. Obviously you know her best but we found having a really clear boundary helpful.

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