I hate having agoraphobia

After having my first baby in 2021, I developed agoraphobia and it got worse/diagnosed in 2023. I can't be outside my house without my husband without having anxiety. somedays, I still have anxiety and dissociate. Right now, I'm literally just sitting on my back porch watching my kids play and the longer we're out here, the more my anxiety is coming out. I truly hate having anxiety in all forms. I just want to live my life almost blissfully ignorant to all the dangers around instead of being hyper aware of everything. I want to be able to look at the sky without feeling like it's not real. I really want to get back on medication but the last time I was on one, it caused the worst side effects that I'm still dealing with years later.

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I definitely relate. I hate leaving my house. I literally despise getting in a car. My anxiety amplifies. My husband reserved a special dinner tonight for my birthday this week (he had work on my birthday) and I honestly don’t want to go I’m sitting here on the couch refusing to get ready 😩😭

Any idea what contributed to the agoraphobia? My aunt had this, and it was always puzzling. Sorry you’re dealing with that.

I slowly am developing this. I have yet to drive or go out alone with our 3mnth old. I told myself next week we’re gonna start. I’m going to drive around just our neighborhood. Then the 12 minutes away drive thru Starbucks. Then Walmart, also 15 minutes away. Haven’t… thought past that, and idk if I’ll even be able to convince myself

@Selena i honestly have no idea, I didn't know i had it until I met with a therapist and she diagnosed me with it. I had always been scared to go out by myself before kids but I'd still go on walks, walk to convenient stores, etc,. After kids, I think I became more aware of all the dangers out there and became scared to even bring them out to our driveway to play. It's hard to explain 😩

@Alexis it's so hard to leave the house with a baby, especially by yourself. I'm glad you are taking baby steps to get out of the house! It sounds like a great plan! I don't even have my license yet due to fears of driving 😩 i have to force myself to get it this year for my kids, I need to be better for them.

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