Why is my baby not sleeping through the night? I am so depressed and feeling like I’ve failed as a mother…
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Always here mama you’re doing an amazing job!
It's nothing you have done - don't blame yourself! All babies sleep differently. Please let your health visitor or GP know you are having these feelings, the last thing they will ever do is remove a baby from a loving home. They will offer help and support for you!
Sorry if this is unhelpful to say, but if your husband is not working at the moment then he needs to step up and help you more! Can you explain how you’re feeling to him? Maybe if you explain that you’re having suicidal thoughts and that if you weren’t there anymore then he’d have to do all the childcare himself, perhaps that would motivate him to help you more. Could you maybe try feeding him laying in bed, that way you might be able to doze off for a bit while he feeds.
I feel your pain but unfortunately it’s completely normal for a baby to wake up multiple times in the night. There is also a six month regression (I’m currently riding the wave). Rest assured it’s not something you’re doing wrong and you have not failed your baby! Have you tried Co sleeping for naps in the day so you can get some more sleep? Get your husband to do a night sleep on the weekend? Do shifts when sleeping? I know easier said than done but try and take your multi vitamins, get fresh air everyday, focus on a really healthy diet etc. it might make you feel a tad better energy wise. Also, the BEST thing you can do even if your family/ friends live far away is express your feelings and if you’re suicidal speak with your doctor. Even to vent on here… you’re not alone. Everything is just a phase and fingers crossed for you that things take a good turn soon xx
It is biologically normal for babies under 1 to wake up in the night, they get scared, hungry, hot, cold etc. Demand that your partner steps up to help you carry the load so you can also sleep
Short answer is because that's what babies do. My oldest more or less slept through from about 2½mo to 4½mo, then suddenly was up every single hour. Gradually improved but the next time he slept through was at 18mo, and around 2yo before he slept through most nights. Second was around 21mo when she first slept through, and still doesn't reliably sleep through at 28mo.
My little girl was the same, slept well, waking once or twice and then it all went wrong at 4 months 🫠🫠 I don’t like the idea of sleep training so I boob back to sleep every time! She never wakes for long and it keeps me drowsy as I’m a terrible sleeper myself. Once she got too big for her next to me, I moved her to her cot but took the side off so it’s against my bed. That way she has her own space but I can easily feed her back to sleep without waking myself too much. Also I stopped tracking because it was depressing! She woke every 50 minutes for months, then every 2 hours… she’s now 14 months and we’re starting to get longer stretches but I’m a long way off going on a night out! It’s really hard when it’s all on you and you’re exhausted but it will get better and it is normal. We’re just unlucky where we live that we are expected to make our babies be independent. You aren’t doing anything wrong or setting up bad habits by doing what is easiest ❤️
I do not feed from the breast but I do however understand everything you have said, it is so hard, I also am the only income provider as my partner is unemployed currently too. My little one has just turned 3 months but we find that the more he drinks “eats” on a morning, the less he needs feeding in the night and he sleep for a rough 6/7 hours that way x